Thursday Thirteen #45 . . . 13 Things To Expect After You Publish Your 1st Book

Yes, I am speaking from experience. If it's on the list, it really happened to me.

1) You will be overwhelmed by the kindness of strangers.

2) You will be less than impressed by the pettiness of folks you thought you knew.

3) If you take a bowl of candy to one of your signings, some little fat kid is bound to come along and help him/herself to a big handful or two. Seriously, some little fat bast--um, I mean--adorable tyke will have the nerve to mean mug you while he/she's scarfing down and/or carting off the bulk of your treats.

4) If you show up at one of your signings with a tray of cookies & brownies, some old guy who claims he's a pastor will help himself to two or three pastries before informing you that he doesn't read the kind of books you write.

5) The thrill of checking your Amazon numbers will be a short-lived one.

6) You'll receive unsolicited phone calls, gifts and other such attention from people whose sole intent is to get close to your agent.

7) You'll discover an online "review" that reads more like a personal attack against you, than an objective critique of the book.

8) Folks who can barely navigate the ins and outs of basic grammar will offer to "edit" your next "fictional novel"-- for a reasonable price, of course.

9) You'll uncover inner strengths and talents you never realized you owned.

10) You'll gain a newfound respect for book lovers, librarians, and independent bookstores.

11) Folk who have no real interest in you or your book will stop by the table where you are signing and insist that you smile and pose for pictures.

12) You'll eventually conclude that writing the book was the easy part.

13) You'll learn not to take candy or pastries to your book signings . . . or perhaps you'll just learn how not to sweat the small stuff (LOL).

If you'd like to visit other

Thursday Thirteen participants

Be My Guest!

AFTER THE DANCE by Lori Johnson . . . AT A BOOKSTORE, RETAIL OUTLET AND / OR LIBRARY NEAR YOU . . .

UPDATE / BREAKING NEWS For those of you who'd rather leave the reading to others, an AUDIO version of After The Dance will soon be available. Yes, that's right--I'm talking CDs, cassettes and via download. Is that cool or what? (smile)

BOOK CLUB MEMBERS For those of you interested in a deeper discount, the book will soon be available through the Black Expressions Book Club. Visit their site for details.

Also, if your book club meets in any of the following areas: Charlotte, Winston-Salem, Durham, Memphis or Cleveland and your members plan to read and discuss the book, please let me know. I'm opening to attending/participating in discussions of the book in person, by arrangement and at no expense to your club OR via teleconference if you live outside of those areas.

REVIEWS Comments about the book have been wonderful, thus far (smile). You'll find links to a few of the reviews in this blog's upper, right hand corner. A couple of the reviews also appear in the novel's listing on Amazon. Feel free to add your own impressions of the novel in Amazon's comment section.

SIGNINGS

Look for me in

Memphis on Saturday April 12th, 2008

11:00 - 1:00 at Barnes & Noble Booksellers (6385 Winchester Blvd) **open to the public**

and

3:00 - 5:00 at Davis-Kidd Booksellers--Bronte Bistro (387 Perkins Road Ext) **invitation only**

I'll post details of my other signings as we move closer to those dates.

LAST WORDS Buy the book y'all or check it out from the library. If you enjoy it, share it with a friend. If you hate it, pass it along to one of your enemies. Either way it goes, I appreciate the support (smile).

ANOTHER WRITER'S WISDOM . . . ON PUBLISHING YOUR FIRST BOOK . . .

While blog hopping several weeks ago, I ran across a gem of a piece entitled "Things I've Learned Since My First Book Got Published." The writer, Cherie Priest, posted a list of 20 things she'd learned in the process of publishing her first book.

Even though my own debut novel is still several months away from hitting the shelves, I can already relate to most of the items on Ms. Priest's list. The following are the ones in particular that made me nod, smile, laugh and had me shouting "Oh so true!"

Priest: "Everyone will think you are rich: Obviously, if you got a book published, someone must have given you fat sacks of cash dollars American . . ."

(My comment: Not only will people assume such, some will be so bold or rude as to ASK about the amount of your advance. Please, if nothing else, do understand, that those six figure book deals you sometimes read or hear about are the EXCEPTIONS, not the rule. Most folks who score a publishing deal are not getting paid mega-bucks. So, if that's the only reason you're trying to write, I'd advise you to look for a more lucrative hustle.)

Priest: "No one will believe you did it by writing a book that was worth publishing. Aspiring writers will be sure you had a secret short cut and you are a raging bitch for holding out on all those other poor folks who are just as worthy as you . . ."

My comment: Why is it some folks want to believe all you need is to secure the right "hook-up" or association with the right person and/or persons and the rest will take care of itself? Maybe there are some folks who actually do brown-nose or bull-s&!t their way into book deals. But I'm inclined to think the majority took the same route I did-- you know, the one that starts with sitting one's butt down in a chair somewhere and writing until there's a finished product? And if you think that part is hard, there's really no need of discussing what comes next.

Priest: "You now have the inside track to publishing. Everyone you've ever known--even in passing--who has ever written a book now thinks it's your God-given duty to put them in touch with your agent/editor/publisher. This will get awkward."

My comment: Ain't that the truth! Again, it appears to be the ole "hook me up" phenomenon at play here. Folks you hardly know and whose work you've never even read want you to "hook them up" with your agent or the editor at your publishing house. Really, this is not the same as making a recommendation for a foot doctor, a plumber or a hair stylist.

When it comes to finding an agent, I really think it's best to do YOUR OWN research as opposed to asking me for mine (smile). Find out the names and the contact info for the agents who represent what you've written. Find out if they're currently taking on new clients. Write them a query letter describing your work, telling them about your background and possibly why you want them to represent you.

Okay, I don't mind you asking me how I got my agent, or even about our working relationship. If I like you and trust that you won't abuse the info (see the next item on the list) I may even give you her name (smile) but PLEASE DON'T ask me for her contact information. It's not my job to hook you up.

Priest: "People will use your name to lie. At least twice, other writers with whom I was peripherally acquainted approached my (now former) agent and told him that I'd recommended them."

My comment: Nothing shocks me any more. In this age of win at all costs, folks seem willing to say or do anything if they think it will get them ahead. This is one of the main reasons I avoid giving out detailed information about my agent and other literary contacts. I have yet to give the name of my agent on this blog, but any savvy Googler can easily find it. But for the record, I honestly haven't been with my agent long enough to feel comfortable recommending folks to her.

Besides, recommendations don't always work out. I got MY FIRST AGENT via a totally unsolicted recommendation from a well-intentioned associate. If I told you who that agent was and who else she represented, you'd probably be incredibly impressed. But even though she eagerly signed me, she, as it turns out, was SO NOT the right agent for me.

As I indicated, these were some of my favorites from Cherie Priest's 20 item list. If you'd like to read the others see: "Things I've Learned Since My First Book Got Published."

COINCIDENCE . . . OR DIVINE INTERVENTION? PT I (A Few Odd Happenings On The Road to Publication)

Have you ever experienced one of those moments in life that made you wonder if what just took place was truly a coincidence or if the hand of GOD had actually come into play? Well, I've had things of that nature happen to me so many times over the years, I've stopped counting them. Still, I'm always momentarily taken aback when they arise.

I'm not talking about those random or odd happenings that sometimes occur when folks with similar interests or like backgrounds collide or meet up in the same place. Just last week, I experienced one of those. While blog-hopping one night, I stumbled upon a funny comment from an artist I'd actually met, barely a couple of weeks before, and whose work I'd admired enough to purchase at a local art festival.

Yes, those isolated "small world" moments are neat, but that's not what I'm talking about. What I mean are those All Up In Your Face moments that force you to nod, if not outright bow to the Higher Power (or unseen forces, if you prefer) working behind the scenes.

Case in point, years ago, when I lived in Memphis and still drove a hoopty, it up and stalled on me a couple of times. Both times the car quit and wouldn't start again were at night and in one of those instances, in a part of the city that could best be described as less than desirable. In the latter instance, it just so happened I was with friends and within walking distance of a well-lit gas station that had a working phone. (This was, of course, in the days before cell phones became all the rage). I called up a cousin, who lived nearby and who, to my surprised and good fortune, just so happened to be at home, instead out making his drug rounds to his usual customers . . . oh yeah, true story.

Anyway, the other time my hoopty died, I was alone and I'd just left a REALLY BAD area, one where I could have been easly hit by a car if not shot, stabbed and kilt dead (ebonics 101 y'all) in the very process of trying to find a working phone. On that particular occasion, as fate would have it, my car screeched to a halt at a corner . . . a corner that was only a 3 minute walk from my favorite aunt and uncle's house.

A couple of odd and random coincidences? No baby, that was some sho' nuff divine intervention because in Memphis if your car dies at night and you don't have ready access to a phone, you'd best start praying the worse the thugs decide to do is take your money, jewelry, rims and what have you . . .

So why am I bringing any of this up? And what, if anything, does it have to do with my book deal? Well, recently a series of odd things happened to me with regards to the pending publication of my novel, AFTER THE DANCE and I felt like sharing . . .

But before I do, I'd like to invite any of you who've experienced similarly odd happenings to share a bit of what transpired in your particular situation.