Thursday Thirteen #37 . . . 13 Areas In Which I'm Woefully Behind . . .

1) Reading -- Don't mean to be redundant, but not only do I have a stack of books awaiting my attention, but the magazine pile is even thicker and taller.

2) Joining The Facebook Revolution -- I really do plan to join one day soon. But I know it's going to be time-consuming and right now, I just can't spare any.

3) Dusting -- Yes, those evil dust bunnies are not only multiplying, they've begun mutating and marauding around here.

4) Decluttering -- I know getting rid of and/or finding better places to store all of my junk would make me feel a whole lot better.

5) Trying new recipes -- I still collect them (which only adds to the clutter), but it's been months since I've tried preparing a new dish.

6) Arranging old pictures in photo albums -- My photo collection is a mess. I stopped regularly cataloging my son's pictures when he was in Kindergarten. He's now a middle-schooler. Sheesh!

7) Doing my taxes -- It's not like we owe anything, at least I don't think we do (smile). As long as we take care of this before April 15th, I guess we'll be all right.

8) Scrap-booking-- Yeah, see #6, 'cause the same applies for all of my son's school and sports memorabilia. Except, it goes back even further. At this rate, he'll be an adult and I'll just be putting together his preschool album . . .

9) Watching dvds I've purchased -- I buy them, but then I don't make time to watch them . . . and then I forget I even have them.

10) Deleting old email -- I kid you not, in one of my email accounts, I have over 500 undeleted email. I read them, but don't take the time to delete the ones I don't need to keep.

11) Updating my blog -- What can I say? One day, I'll get to it.

12) Visiting the dentist -- I'm so ashamed. I still have all of them, my teeth, that is (smile) and I am making sure the kid goes on the regular.

13) Having pictures developed -- I have a disposable camera that has undeveloped pictures on it from last summer. Everyday, I say I'm gonna take them to be developed, but it has yet to happen.

So, am I the only one?

Would you like to visit other Thursday Thirteeners?

Be my guest!

Theo & Charmaine . . . Did What?!

Do you all remember "Theo" (Malcolm-Jamal Warner) from the Cosby Show and "Charmaine" (Karen Malina-White) who starred in both the Cosby Show and A Different World? Well, I just learned they got married! Yup, I ran across the item while hanging out at A Diary of A Content Black Woman's blog last night. (Click HERE to view the Content Black Woman's post and to see a picture of the happy couple).

I'm not so sure why the thought of the two of them jumping the broom makes me smile, but it does. Maybe because I have such fond memories of both of those shows (Cosby & A Different World). Or perhaps because the news is a welcome and much needed sign that not all is lost and gone to rot when it comes to young love, particularly in the aftermath of the whole Chris Brown & Rihanna debacle.

Of course, had I learn that "Theo" and "Rudy" had gotten themselves hitched, it might have taken me more than a minute to adjust, if only because those two played siblings on the Cosby Show (LOL). Yeah, I know, it was all make-believe, but in my head somewhere, that whole world still very much exists (smile).

Anyway, I wish them all the very best.

Books On My . . . Waiting To Be Read List . . .

Yes, I'm still here (smile). At the moment, I'm tied up with a few other projects. I'm so tied up, I don't even have time to read . . . well, not for leisure, anyway. The other day I was reviewing the list I maintain on my "Goodreads" bookshelf and wishing I could dive into a few of the titles. I'm not really sure where I'd start first, but the following are some of the top selections on my "waiting to be read list" and where appropriate, why the books are on my list.

1) Before I Forget (by Leonard Pitts) Just last week I read a review of this one and said, "Hmm, sounds like a winner." From what I understand it's about a man who has just learned he's in the early stages of Alzheimers and who decides to take his troubled son to meet his father (the boy's grandfather) who is dying from cancer.

2) They Tell Me of a Home (by Daniel Black) I read a quote by this author a day or two ago and it piqued my interest about his work.

3) Shifting Through Neutral (by Bridgett Davis) I've had this book on my shelves for a while. Recently, I bumped it up on my "waiting to be read" list after I spoke with the author's mother-in-law (smile). The mother-in-law is a member of the Beachwood, OH book club who recently read and discussed my novel.

4) The Black Girl Next Door: A Memoir (by Jennifer Baszile) Having experienced being the only African American in a number of different school and social settings, throughout my childhood and teens, I figured I might be able to relate to some of Ms. Baszile experiences.

5) Act Like A Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy and Commitment (by Steve Harvey) When I first heard about this book, I wasn't terribly interested. But when I actually heard a few of Mr. Harvey's opinions and observations, I changed my mind. He made more than a few good points, so I'm willing to hear him out.

6) Ralph Ellison: A Biography (Arnold Rampersad) I've had this book for a while and I'm looking forward to reading it, but I just haven't had the time. Several years ago, I bought, read and enjoyed the two volumes Mr. Rampersad wrote on the life and times of Langston Hughes.

7) A Mercy & Tar Baby (by Toni Morrison) For those who don't know, these are two separate titles by the author, Toni Morrison. A Mercy is her latest and Tar Baby is the only other fiction title by Morrison I haven't attempted/or found time to read, as of yet. I do own both of these books and hope to read one, if not both before the end of the year.

8) The Healing (by Gayl Jones) It's been years since I read anything by Gayl Jones. I must admit, in the past, I found her a difficult read (intensity-wise) But a couple of weeks ago, I read an old NY Times newspaper article about her that made me want to revist her work. A couple of my writing pals had good things to say about The Healing, so I figured I'd give it a try.

9) Fearless Jones, The Man In My Basement and The Right Mistake: The Further Philosophical Investigations of Socrates Fortlow (by Walter Mosley) I've read most of Mosley's "Easy Rawlins" mysteries. But Mr. Mosley has a written a number of books I haven't read. The aforementioned are three I hope to find time for this year.

10) Reel to Real: Race, Sex and Class at the Movies & Rock My Soul: Black People and Self-Esteem (by bell hooks) I used to read a lot of bell's work. In recent years, I've fallen shamefully behind (smile).

11) Sexual Healing (by Jill Nelson) I've enjoyed Ms. Nelson's work in the past and I've been meaning to read this for some time.

12) When Chickenheads Come Home To Roost: My Life as A Hip Hop Feminist (by Joan Morgan) Yes, this is another one that's been out forever that I should have read years ago, but haven't. In case you haven't figured it out, I'm something of a "Hip Hop Feminist" myself (smile).

13) The Coldest Winter Ever (by Sister Souljah) Everybody and their mama has read this book. But to be honest, I never had a real desire to read it until the last couple of years or so. I do own a copy, so maybe one day soon . . .

Okay, there are plenty of others, but I think I'll stop there. So, does my list look anything like you thought it might? What, if anything do you think it says about me? (smile)

If you've read any of the titles on my list, feel free to share your impressions of the book. If you haven't read any of the titles on my list, perhaps you could share some of the books on your "waiting to be read" list.

The Never-Ending Battle . . . Over The Battle Flag . . .

Malcolm, my blogging buddy who runs the show over at Diversity Ink (and Pop Culture Dish, Presented by Malcolm), recently started a discussion about the Confederate flag.

In a separate post on Diversity Ink, are my thoughts on the subject. Even though I've taken the liberty of duplicating my remarks about the flag here in The Old School Mix, I hope you will take at peek at Malcolm's comments on the issue, as well as some of the other topics being discussed by the Diversity Ink contributors. As always, feel free to add your own opinions to the mix.

The first time I was moved to write about this subject was way back in 1989. My essay appeared as a guest column in The Memphis Commercial Appeal and was penned in response to a previous guest column by an individual, who, among other things, described the Confederate battle flag as a "symbol of a proud and honorable people."

While I acknowledged the writer's right to interpret the Confederate flag in a positive light, I shared my own reasons for not being able to do so. The following is a somewhat revised excerpt from my original essay, which also holds the honor of being my first published newspaper piece.

Flag Remains A Symbol of Oppression

by Lori D. Johnson

It is difficult to understand how people can disscuss the Civil War in terms of brave soldiers and battles fought without mentioning that not all of the ideals fought for were admirable. How does one embrace the Confederate flag without embracing the evil beliefs which prompted its creation?

As a Southerner, the Confederate flag is also a part of my heritage. But unlike Mr.____ , I detest it, just as conscientious individuals in Germany, South Africa and indeed all over the world, detest the symbols of Nazism and apartheid as symbols of oppression. For me, the flag does not represent hospitality or regional pride. Instead, it represents the Confederacy's efforts to preserve a caste system, a way of life that was wrong and unjust.

Yes, it is honorable for soldiers to fight and die for the causes they believe. While it is only fair that we acknowledge their sincerity and courageousness, in the same breath we must also condem their convictions when they uphold the degradation of other human beings as proper and righteous.

As an African American, I recoil at Mr. ____'s attempt to equate the battles of the Confederacy with those of the civil rights movement. The former was a struggle to protect the ill-gotten rights of a privileged few. The latter sought to guarantee the inalienable rights of all who choose to live in America and believe in its Constitution.

Let us not forget that the war is over and the South was defeated. The flag served its purpose and is entitled to a place in history. It is not entitled to a place on the flag poles of a country that strives to make real the promises of freedom, justice and equality for all.

As a woman, the flag symbolizes to me the Confederacy's approval of the exploitation and abuse of my gender. It did not wave to defend the honor and dignity of enslaved women and girls subjected to the desires of men who were not their husbands or chosen lovers. It cast no shadows upon the breeding of women like cattle. It did not rise to condem the bastardizing of children destined for the auction block and sold to the highest bidder.

As a human being, my perspective prevents me from ever interpreting the Confederate flag as anything but a symbol of oppression.

It is not my wish to forget the past. There are too many lessons yet to be learned. But what has the South to gain by giving odes to an ancient relic of a lost cause? The challenge of the present is setting forth a new course for the future. Let us create new symbols under which to unite and put away the old ones, which had caused so much pain, for so many, for too long.

Book & Movie Combos . . .

The idea for this post grew out of a visit I paid to the Bumble's Movie Meme, this past Monday. The Bumble's blog post dealt with books they'd read, which, at some point in time, had been turned into movies. The "best movie adaptations" if you will. Well, I named a couple right off the top of my head. But later, after giving it some thought, I realized I'd read a number of books, which at some point were cast on either the big or the little screen.

Below are the book & movie combinations I've come up with, thus far. As many books as I've read in my lifetime, I'm sure there at least a few others. I thought it might be fun to color code them, so if the listing appears in red, I didn't really care for the book or the movie (smile). If the listing appears in purple, I loved them both. If the listing is in black, I thought both the book and the movie were okay. If you see brown, I enjoyed the movie a lot more than I did the book.

As far as that last item is concerned, I know typically it's the other way around-folks generally enjoy the book more than the movie. But for whatever reason, that seldom happens for me. There are several movies I've enjoyed a whole lot more than the actual books upon which the screen versions were based. Hey, go figure, I'm weird like that (smile).

My list begins with the oldest title first.

1) Their Eyes Were Watching God (by Zora Neale Hurston) the book--1937 / the movie--2005. Yeah, I know, it really is the unpolitically correct thing to admit, but I'm not a big fan of the book or the movie version. I do have mad love for some of Ms. Hurston's other work. The same goes for Halle Berry who played Janie in the movie.

2) A Native Son (by Richard Wright) the book--1940 / the movie 1951 & 1986. This is another one that's liable to get my literary Black card snatched and cut up. Sorry, I didn't like the book nor either of the movie versions. The 1951 version is truly painful to watch.

3) A Raisin In The Sun (by Lorraine Hansberry) A book containing the play came out in 1958. Movies based on the book came out in 1961, 1989 & 2008. When I was a kid, I borrowed (stole) the paperback copy I have of this book from my mother's library (smile). The 1961 screen play, featuring Sidney Poiter and Ruby Dee is my favorite of the three movie versions.

4) One Who Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (by Ken Kesey) the book--1962 / the movie-1975

5) The Water is Wide (by Pat Conroy) the book --1972 / the movie based on the book was called Conrack and came out in 1974.

6) The Shining (by Stephen King) the book--1977 / the movie--1980

7) The Color Purple (by Alice Walker) the book--1982 / the movie--1985 Okay, I really dislike reading books written in dialect. So, yes, I did enjoy the movie more than the book. Matter of fact, upon its release I saw it at the theatre (with different friends & relatives) on at least 4 different occasions!

8) The Women Of Brewster's Place (by Gloria Naylor) the book--1982 / the movie--1989. 9) Disappearing Acts (by Terry McMillan) the book--1989 / the movie--2000.

10) Devil In A Blue Dress (by Walter Mosley) the book--1990 / the movie--1995.

11) Waiting To Exhale (by Terry McMillan) the book--1992 / the movie--1995

12) How Stella Got Her Groove Back (by Terry McMillan) the book--1996 / the movie--1998

13) A Lesson Before Dying (by Earnest Gaines) the book--1997 / the movie--1999. I believe a couple of Mr. Gaines other books have been made into movies, but sadly, I haven't seen them. I'd like too though, because I loved both the book and the movie.

14) Always Out Numbered, Always Out Gunned (by Walter Mosley) the book--1997 / the movie--1998. Great book and an excellent movie. I know Mr. Mosley has a series with the main character of this book, Socrates Fortlow, but this is the only one I've read, thus far. The movie stars Lawrence Fishburne who is always a joy to watch on screen.

Okay, are there any book & movie combos you'd care to mention? Or, feel free to comment on any of mine, if you'd like.

Snow Days . . . Yay or Nay?

Baby Boy's First Snow

Memphis, TN 199?

From Lori's Picture Collection

Over the weekend, it snowed, here in Charlotte and in my hometown of Memphis, TN. As the picture above clearly indicates, my young'n loves the snow. The snow we get in Charlotte is not unlike the snow we used to get in Memphis--rare, typically nothing more than one or two inches or a light dusting and generally gone in a day's time. And I must say, that suits me just fine.

The Hubby Giving Baby Boy

A Lesson In Snow Removal

Memphis, TN 199?

From Lori's Picture Collection

Most good Southerners know that as soon as the warning goes out (The weather man said it's gonna snow!), the first thing that happens is a run on the grocery stores. Yes, some of us do shop like we're gonna be trapped indoors for weeks. But the truth is, a lot of time when it snows in these parts, things will shut down. Not necessarily because of the snow, but due to the ice. You see, a lot of times, when the snow melts, it tends to refreeze over night. The resulting ice downs power lines, knocks out electricity and makes driving something you don't want to do unless you're a thrill seeker, have a death wish or you absolutely must.

My Brother & His Buddy

Enjoying a North Dakota Snow Day

Grand Forks, North Dakota 197?

From Lori's Picture Collection

I'm no stranger to the snow as the picture above will attest. I snapped this picture of my little brother, standing outside of our home, when we lived on the Grand Forks Air Force Base in North Dakota. You see how high the snow is relative to the door? Yeah, we had to dig our way out of that bad boy. As a child, I also had the experience of living in Mountain Home, Idaho and Rome, New York, two other places where the snow is plentiful in the winter time.

The Beachwood Bunnies

Nana & Baby Boy

Beachwood, OH 2005

From Lori's Picture Collection

Of course, I've written a number of posts about my days as an adult in the Cleveland area. The picture above is a snapshot of my mom and my son rolling and frolicking, like nuts (smile), in the snowing covering the front yard of our Cleveland area (Beachwood) home.

But have you noticed the one thing missing from the pictures I've post? Yeah, me. That's 'cause, unless I'm taking pictures, or running (slipping, sliding, trudging) to the car or the house, I typically Don't Do Snow.

Yeah, when I lived in the Cleveland area, that first snow was pretty and all. But after that, it was OLD. As far as I'm concerned, snow from mid-November thru late April and early May, just ain't normal. Little girls are not supposed to be dressed up in their cute little Easter dresses, looking for Easter eggs in the doggone snow! No, that mess is SO NOT normal. (LOL).

So when it comes to snow, my vote is a resounding NAY! Really, I prefer to enjoy mine from a distance. Yup, memory, pictures, greeting cards and TV footage of snow (preferably falling elsewhere) is fine by me. What about you?

Thursday Thirteen #36 . . . Thirteen Places/Ways To Meet People . . .

A couple of years ago, a friend of mine and her husband went their separate ways after 17 years of marriage. Recently, my friend went out with a guy she met through an online dating service. On last report, all went well. While I admire my friend's sense of adventure and willingness to try something new, were I in the same situation, I'm not sure I could go the online route.

Ever since hearing about my friend's choice, I've been wondering about the alternatives and options. If you're single and not particularly into the whole club scene, how do you go about meeting other single people? More to the point, were I to suddenly find myself single again, what type of places might I visit, activities might I engage in or routes might I explore in my quest for companionship?

I doubt if online dating is something I'd ever consider. On the surface, it just doesn't appeal to me, even though I've joined groups and met a number of decent folks offline via my online contacts and connections. But to be clear, I wasn't looking to date or get romantically involved with any of those folks.

As odd as it may sound, I'd probably also automatically rule out grocery stores and religious institutions. First of all, I just don't see a lot of young, single-looking guys (I'm willing to admit, 'single-looking" is an assumption) in the grocery store. I know they've gotta eat sometime, but I'm guessing after a quick run to the beer, chip and possibly the frozen food aisles, most of them are in the store and out. Now, if one is in the market for somebody else's husband, the grocery store is probably just the place to find him. He'll be the one with the lost look on his face and the honey-do list in his hand.

The religious "rule-out" is a bit more complicated and admittedly a bit more biased. Even though I've been a member of and regularly attended many a fine religious insitution in my lifetime, to be frank, "church men" just don't appeal to me. Back in the day, when I was single, I had more than my share of unsavory experiences with men, who though they quoted scripture and went to church on a regular basis, were certified nut-cases and/or straight-up buck wild hypocrites and super freaks. LOL.

And I know that works both ways. I knew this guy who joined a church and a Sunday School class for the sole purpose of hooking up with and getting over on some humble, unsuspecting church girl, only to end up getting a whole lot more than he bargained for . . . I'm talking crabs, people . . . yeah, the little crawly, itchy, all up in the pu&!c hair kind? Can the church say, "Glory! Have mercy! That sho'll is nasty!" LOL

Of course, you can luck-up (or out) and find a creep anywhere. But the following list includes some of the places I'd consider frequenting and activities I'd consider getting involved, were I single and looking to meet somebody

1) A Friend's Family Gathering--My own extended family celebrates a lot of the holidays together and there are always plenty of single men present. Were I single, I'd definitely try to snag an invite to someone's Fourth of July or Memorial Day backyard barbecue. Unfortunately, in my case, I don't think introducing any of my single friends to any of my single relatives would be such a great idea (LOL).

2) Art Exhibits--I happen to have a genuine interest in art, so this would be a natural choice for me.

3) Book Stores--Again, I'm a booklover and I've noticed a lot of folks do hangout in book stores these days, particularly on the weekends. Striking up a conversation with a fellow booklover wouldn't be that hard.

4) College Courses/Adult Education Courses-- Why not look for love or companionship in an environment where others are striving to stimulate their minds, pick up a new skill set and/or better themselves?

5) Coffee Shops--Just about every city or suburb is full of these and they're open at all hours of the day and night. Were I single, I just might choose a different one to vist every weekend. Why settle for sitting at home alone with a book and/or your laptop when you could do both at a coffee shop and possibly meet someone interesting in the process?

6) Dog Parks--Guys who own dogs, generally walk them. If I owned a dog, I would think this might be a good place to meet someone who at least shared my interest in healthy, well-adjusted canine.

7) Group/Association/Club--This seems like a no-brainer. Join something, a professional organization, a neighborhood association, a writing group, Weight-Watchers (smile), the possibilites are endless.

8) Gym/YMCA--Who doesn't need to exercise more? Were I single and looking to mingle, I'd stay away from the areobics class and hang out with the fellas using the machines and the weights or walking/jogging along the track.

9) Library-- I used to work in a library, so I know single guys do frequent and work in such places. Of course, the guy who hangs out in the library everyday in order to sleep, gawk at online porn or actively research the number of Martians and Leprechauns living among us, is probably not the guy with whom you want to strike up a conversation.

10) Outdoor Music and/or Art Festivals-- In addition to people, typically, there's plenty of food and fresh air at events like these. So even if you don't meet anyone, you're bound to have a good time.

11) Restaurant Bar--When eating out, why not try sitting at the bar sometimes rather than a table? I would think a single guy is more apt to approach a woman who's seated at the bar as apposed to the chick who's getting her grub on alone at some table.

12) Sporting Events-- The great thing about sports is that typically the fans out number the participants. If you can't afford to go to an actual game, there's always the sports bar.

13) Volunteer Activities-- Were I single, this would probably be the first place I'd start looking in hopes of finding someone with a generous spirit and who values helping others.

What about you? Care to share any ideas or suggest a few things you've actually done or perhaps, you've avoided doing? (smile)

Interested in

Other Thursday Thirteen Participants?

Thursday Thirteen #35 . . . 13 Film Favorites Featuring Kids . . .

The recent buzz surrounding Slumdog Millionaire has me thinking about some of the other movies featuring child actors that I've enjoyed over the years. The following are some of my favorites.

1) A Bronx Tale-- I truly adore this movie. One of my favorite scenes is when the little kid, who's been hanging out with the neighborhood gangsters tearfully tells his dad, "Sonny is right, the working man is a sucker. . . " The Dad, a hard-working bus driver, played by Robert De Niro responds, "He's wrong, it don't take much strength to pull a trigger. But try getting up every morning, day after day and work for a living. Let's see him try that. Then we'll see who's the real tough guy."

2) Akeelah and The Bee-- In this movie, KeKe Palmer steals the spotlight from veterans like, Lawrence Fishburne and Angela Bassett.

3) The Bad News Bears--The first two originals films were pretty funny.

4) Claudine--Yes, this is an oldie, but goodie starring Diahann Carroll and James Earl Jones. The kids in this movie do an excellent job of just being kids and I'm always moved by the little guy who when asked what he wants to be when he grows up says, "Invisible."

5) Crooklyn--One of Spike's Lee best, in my opinion. I do wonder if any of the kids featured in this movie are still working.

6) The Harry Potter Movies--Even though I typically wait until the movies make it to cable or come out on DVD, I still enjoy them and I kinda hate that the kids who star in them are growing up (smile).

7) J.T.-- This movie came out WAY back in the day (smile), 1969. But it used to air on television around Christmas time in the '70s. The movie starred a young Kevin Hooks, who played a shy kid from Harlem who finds and nurses an old, injured, one-eyed alleycat back to health. I'd love to get this on dvd for my own kid to watch and enjoy.

8) Poltergeist--The first one.

9) The Pursuit of Happyness--No disrespect intended, but Actually, I think Will Smith's son (Jaden) is a much better actor than his dad (LOL).

10) Ray-- I thought the little boy who played Ray Charles as a youth, C.J. Sanders, did an exceptional job.

11) The Sandlot -- I know there are two, but I've only seen the first one. This is one of those movies, I accidentally stumbled upon one lazy afternoon and found myself enjoying. It's one of my own kid's favorites as well.

12) Slumdog Millionaire -- The performances of the children in this movie are what really made it an outstanding film for me.

13) Stand By Me -- I'd been meaning to watch this movie for years, but just recently got around to it. All I can say is, "Wow." These kids really did a great job. Although, it is kind of sad knowing the twists and turns some of their careers and lives went on to take.

Well, do you agree with any of my choices? If there are others on your own list, feel free to mention them in the comments.

If you'd like to visit some of the other Thursday Thirteen participants, the link is HERE.

The Latest Entertainment Nonsense . . . In The News . . .

Chris Brown vs. Rihanna

Last night it was reported that Chris Brown was being pursued for questioning about an alleged assault against an unidentified woman. Rumor has it that the woman in question is his girlfriend, Rihanna.

My first thought when I heard this was, Dag, Ole Boy obviously skipped the chapter in the Thug Handbook that advises against striking Light-Skinned women (ditto White women) upside the head. Sheesh, y'all know we bruise easily! Being a member of the Light-Skinned tribe himself, you'd think Mr. Brown would already know this.

All joking aside, hopefully this will serve as a lesson to young Chris that striking a woman, any woman isn't a route he wants to take, unless he's looking to emulate the careers of folks Ike Turner or OJ, both of whom could have readily advised him about the Thug Handbook's Light-Skinned/White woman beat-down rules . . .

Michael Phelps vs. The Richland County South Carolina Sheriff

Okay, so a picture materalizes of Mr. Phelps taking a hit off a bong and now the sheriff in Richland County, South Carolina where the incident allegedly took place wants to press charges. Yeah, right. I mean seriously, I could see if the boy got caught sucking on a crack pipe or snorting something up his nose, shooting something into his veins or standing on a corner dealing. But this just seems pretty doggone trivial to me.

If South Carolina is anything like North Carolina (where I currently reside), then drunk driving is pretty much a daily local news item. I don't know if it's that whole Dukes of Hazard NASCAR mentality or what. But every other day it seems, some drunk fool is driving down the wrong side of the road, crashing into trees, rolling down embankments or worse yet, causing accidents that result in serious injury or death to other drivers, passengers and or pedestrians.

If law enforcement officials in the Carolinas are looking to crack down on drug use and abuse, why not start with all of these speeding drunk a$$ drivers who get these laughably light sentences? In any case, I'm pretty sure the good citizens of Richland County have bigger issues in need of addressing, say like Umemployment. Poverty. Racism. Real Crime.

It's also rather interesting how your average citizen or celebrity can be charged with a crime on the basis of a photo, but you can have twenty minutes worth of video footage of a cop beating the hell out of somebody and somehow, that's not enough proof for conviction. Anyway . . .

The Octuplets Mom (Nadya Sulema) vs Anybody With A Sound Mind

Okay, from the looks of things, homegirl has some serious issues. When I heard that she'd received disability compensation after being injured in a riot that took place in psychiatric facility, my first thought was Well, that explains everything. During the riot she obviously hit her head on something . . .

As I watched an excerpt from the interview she did with Ann Curry, I said to my husband, "In addition to being coo-coo for Coco Puffs, I think homegirl has had a wee bit too much plastic surgery." Really, something about her nose and her lips just didn't seem right. She looked like a mangled cross between Lil Kim, Michael Jackson and some sort of feral feline, the latter of which might account for her incomprehensible desire to give birth to a litter. Sure enough, since my first sighting of Ms. Suleman others have suggested she's gone under the knife a time or two and may possibly be suffering from some sort of Angelia Jolie complex.

Etta James vs Beyonce

You know, I really can't blame Ms. James for being upset about not receiving an invitation to sing "her song" at the inauguration. I'm sure she felt like she'd been overlooked, yet again. But her rant against Beyonce was a bit much.

No disrespect intended, but while listening to Ms. James' spiel, I couldn't help but think about those women I'd sometimes see in those dark, smoky cafes one of my grandmothers used to work in. I'm talking about those women who'd be sitting and nodding at a table by themselves, with a crooked wig on their heads, a cigarette in their mouths and a half-empy forty on the table in front of them. Some of the stuff that came out of their mouths would bring tears to your eyes (smile).

A FEW SAD SIGNS . . . OF THE TIMES . . .

Remember the bookstore (Brentano's) signings I had back in December, while I was home (Memphis) for the holidays? Well, a couple of weeks ago, the bookstore CLOSED! I was beyond shocked when I heard the news. A steady flow of customers is all I saw on the Tuesday and Saturday that I sat near the front of the store and signed copies of After The Dance. But obviously, that wasn't always the case. I'm particularly saddened by the closing because of its location in a mall (Oak Court) that I used to frequent. I've never known there not to be a bookstore in that particular spot in the mall and its hard for me to imagine anything besides a book vendor being there.

Not too long ago, I experienced a similar shock here in Charlotte, when a nearby restaurant (Good Old Days) that my family and I used to enjoy patronizing went out of business. I remember driving past there one Sunday and thinking it odd that there weren't more cars in their parking lot. While watching the news later that same evening, I discovered why the lot had been so barren--earlier in the day, the restaurant had closed their doors for good. Wow! Had I know it was coming, I would have made a point of eating there that Sunday. They had great service and some of the best hamburgers (smile).

Perhaps even more telling was what I heard with regards to a couple of friends who had the misfortune of having their homes broken into. To be clear, crime has long been off the chain in Memphis--robberies, car-jackings, break-ins and assaults of all kinds happen so often, if a series of such isn't being reported on the local news or discussed around the water cooler, folks tend to think something is wrong.

But I was truly shocked to learn that several folks in Memphis who've had their homes broken into recently have had their freezers and refrigerators emptied in the process. Yup, folks are stealing FOOD y'all. My first reaction was dag--up in somebody's house stealing their dagum tater tots and neckbones out the freezer?! How trifling can you get?! But then my next thought was, you know, you've got to be awfully doggone desperate and/or hungry to break into somebody's houes and bypass the tv and dvd player in order to steal their chicken wings and porkchops.

Yeah, I can only hope and pray that "the new day" gets here sooner rather than later.

Thursday Thirteen # 34 . . . 13 Things, I Assure You, I Don't Want To See . . .

1) Your drawers -- I don't care if they are clean. I don't care if you bought 'em off Ebay from Puffy or borrowed them from Madonna; I don't care if they're lined in silver and/or gold -- All I'm asking is that you pluck 'em up off the dang floor (ditto the dining room table, chandelier, etc.) before I come over and/or pull up your sagging or low-riding jeans!

2) Footage of you or any of your loved ones giving birth -- To be clear, any home movies containing surgical procedures, blood, gore and/or screaming (in the notable absence of a rollercoaster) I can very well do without.

3) Your corns, hammertoes and/or bunions -- If your tootsies look like they're coated in oatmeal or belong on a rooster, eagle, dragon or some other winged critter (mythical or real), please don't go barefoot or wear sandals around me.

4) Any of your removable body parts -- If any of your body parts come off or pop off, I'm more than willing to take your word for it.

5) Your nail clippings -- Were I into hoo-doo and looking to cast a spell or curse on your behind, your ole nasty clippings might come in handy. But since I'm not, dispose of them properly, please.

6) Your false teeth or your raggedly-looking mouth without them -- It's not often I prefer illusion over reality, but this is definitely one such case.

7) Your boobs -- Okay, unless you're nursing a child (preferably one under the age of 2) or you're experiencing a wardrobe malfunction, I really don't care to see your girls.

8) The sonogram image from your ultrasound -- I understand your excitement at your pending arrival, but unless the image is in 3-D or you're in the last month of your third trimester, I really don't know what the heck I'm looking at.

9) Pictures of you or any of your friends and/or relatives drunk or in the buff -- Fair warning, if you email me some mess like this or invite me to view such on your Facebook or MySpace page, you're putting our friendship in serious jeopardy.

10) Your a$$ crack -- Unless we're in an intimate relationship or for some socially acceptable reason, I find myself forced to change or clean your nasty behind, please spare me this trauma.

11) Anything a physician has removed from your body -- The sole exception being a child, of course. But gall stones, kidneys stones, warts, moles, tumors and other such growths . . . yeah, I'm really not trying to see any of that.

12) The excessive hair growing from your ears, nose, arm pits or covering your back -- Unless you've got paperwork verifying that you are indeed a Cro-Magnon, do me a favor and keep all of that stuff neatly trimmed or to yourself.

13) Any of your bodily waste products -- Really, some things ought to go without saying. But in the event that they don't, wipe your nose, flush the toilet and get thee quickly to the nearest doctor and/or shrink if the situation dictates such measures.

Well, are there any others you'd like to add? As long as you don't get too gross or x-rated, have at it (smile).

For those of you who don't know, sadly, the old Thursday Thirteen site and meme no longer exists. But a new crew has decided to keep the tradition going under a slightly different format. See Here for more info.

Now That President Obama Is 'The Man' . . . What Are Your 'Yes We Can' Plans?

So what's next?

Now that all of the cheers and tears have come to past . . . Now that all of the partying is over and the songs have all been written and sung . . . Now that Barack Hussein Obama has officially been sworn in as the 44th President of these United States and we've all claimed a bit of the historic moment for ourselves . . . what do we do next?

I'm saying, you do know there's still a lot of work to be done and even with all of his charisma, intellect, and unquestionable ability, President Obama can't do it alone? Really, isn't it time we stopped being the type of people who will show up for the party, but can't be found when it's time to roll up our sleeves and get to work?

No, I'm serious. Did we not all nod in agreement when Obama said, "We are the ones we've been waiting for?" Well, if "Yes We Can" is ever to be more than a catchy campaign slogan, don't we need to take that next step and start asking ourselves, "Yes we can--what?"

Perhaps, like me, you've already done so. When the Obamas, as a family, made a point of getting involved in community service projects on the MLK holiday, I'm pretty sure they were attempting to set an example. But the truth is, some of us, my family included, had already made plans to spend a portion of the day engaged in such endeavors. It's something we've done for the past several years now.

Of course, the truth of the matter is, I was on the Obama bandwagon long before he even announced his candidacy. After reading his book, Dreams From My Father, something inside of me said, you know, this guy just might be The One (as apposed to That One *smile*). But it wasn't until I heard his nomination acceptance speech at the Democratic Convention that I felt inspired to go beyond thinking and griping about the problems that faced our nation and becoming more involved in some community relief project.

The task I've taken on is helping to feed the hungry. In recent months, I've been moved by a number of different articles that have detailed the on-going fight to end hunger. One article in particular told the story about a group of kids, who though enrolled in an after school hunger program, were writing in their journals about being hungry over the weekends. To me, it is both heartbreaking and a disgrace that any child in the United States (or elsewhere in the world for that matter) would spend a day, much less an entire weekend, hungry.

So, I figured since I'm in the grocery store a couple of times a week, anyway, why not pick up a something or a few things for someone else, every time I go? And that's what my guys and I have been doing over the past several months. We keep a box in the kitchen and once it's full of items, we drop it off by the local food bank. It's a small thing, but I think it makes a big difference in some one else's life as well as in our own hearts. And for me and mine, it's a step and a start in the right direction.

Your contribution doesn't have to mimic ours. Your calling might be bigger or it might be something smaller. But I do think it's imperative that those of us who voted for and say we support the ideals put forth by President Barack H. Obama . . . Get Up . . . Go Out . . . and DO SOMETHING!

I've shared a bit of my plans and efforts. Now, what are YOU gonna do?

There's A New Blog In Town . . . Diversity Ink . . .

I'd like to take a moment and tell you about a coalition I was recently invited to join. A group of multi-ethnic and multi-racial bloggers, led and founded by one of my blogging buds, Malcolm (of Pop Culture Dish, Presented By Malcolm fame) has joined forces to produce a blog called Diversity Ink. The blog will address a variety of issues pertaining to race and with the hope of creating a dialogue between folks of different racial and ethnic backgrounds.

In the first post, Malcolm shares a bit more detail about the groups' origins and purpose . . . "The Purpose of Diversity Ink."

Other recent posts include "White Privilege: Myth or Reality" by Pjazzypar and "Work To Be Done" by Marvalus.

If you get a free moment in the coming days, I hope you'll take a moment to check out the entire blog, participate in the conversation (if you are so moved) and help spread the word about the coalition.

It's a new day y'all. Let's make the best of it.

Authors Behaving . . . Badly . . .

I'm always fascinated by what folks share with me upon discovering that I'm a published author. At the doctor's office the other day, a woman shared with me a story about a book signing she'd attended at a local bookstore. The popular author was one whose work the woman had enjoyed in the past and she was too tickled at the opportunity to finally meet this person in the flesh.

Unfortunately, most of this woman's good feelings about the author soured when she (the woman telling the story) stepped up to the table and handed the author her book. The author looked at the woman, frowned and said, "This book is old. I'm only signing copies of my new book today."

Well, the woman said she wasn't about to get out of line, grab one of the new books and get back in line again. So, she reached over, snagged herself a book and said, "Okay, sign this."

Rather than happily oblige, the author looked at the woman, frowned again and grumbled, "You haven't even paid for this yet."

The woman was like, "Dag, would you just sign the book already! I am not getting out of line just to pay for this and then have to get back in line all over again."

Well, the woman finally got her book signed. But she hasn't forgotten the experience and her feelings about the author in question are hardly what they used to be.

Granted, everyone is entitled to their own way of doing things, but had I been the author, I would have signed the old book and thanked the fan for taking the time to come out and meet me. Sheesh, isn't that what folks with common sense and good home-training do? Yes, I understand and appreciate the desire to make a profit, but sometimes it ain't about "short money," it's about the long-game and the big picture. Chances are, not only will that woman never buy another book by that particular author, but some of the other bystanders who witnessed the incident will in the futute, no doubt, keep their money in their pockets as well.

That's not the first story I've heard about authors behaving badly. And some of the behavior I've been privelged to see with my own two eyes, would truly be funny, if it weren't so damn sad. I'm sorry, I just I don't get these writers, authors, scribblers and scribes who've decided they're the best thing to hit the scene since barbequed chicken wings. They treat people any kind of way. They talk to people any kind of way.

I remember how much I used to enjoy this one author's blog. I'd never read his work, but his blog was funny and insightful, though somewhat edgy at times. Before I could go out and purchase a couple of his books, I read an exchange between him and a visitor to his blog. The author's comments toward the visitor were so mean-spirited and condescending and in a so much holier and smarter than thou kind of way, it was a complete turn-off. It's been over a year since I read the exchange and till this day, I still haven't read or purchased any of the author's books.

I mean really, people, we write books . . . most of us aren't out here risking life and limb in order to rescue folks from burning buildings . . . most of us aren't actively engaged in searching for the cure for cancer . . . not too many of us are capable of safely landing a plane in a body of water, much less walking across some without sinking.

So, for those of you still out there swinging your big heads through the clouds, and acting like folks are supposed to drop to their knees and fawn all over you when you walk into a room, get a damn grip and stop ruining it for the rest of us.

After The Dance . . . The Movie . . .

Before anyone gets too excited, perhaps I should take a moment to clarify . . . there are no offers on the table . . . no options are currently being discussed . . . and no directors or movie mogul types are currently leaving voice mail messages on my phone. I'm simply dreaming aloud . . . fantasizing, as we creative types are apt to do (smile).

Yes, like a lot of writers, I'd love to see my novel land on the big screen. But in my on-going discussions with folks who've read After The Dance, I've discovered that the actors and actresses I envision playing Carl, Faye, Nora, Scoobie, Cousin Squirrel and the crew, don't always line up with the ones selected by the novel's readers.

For instance, yesterday, during my teleconference with some of the good folks at the Raleigh Branch of the Memphis Public Library, it was suggested that Don Cheadle might make a great Carl. I was like, "Huh! Don Cheadle?! He's way too skinny and too, ahem, mature-looking to play Carl. LOL. My reaction was very similiar, several months ago, when a friend suggested Carl Lumbly for the role of Carl. Nuh-Uh!

Okay y'all, as much as I admire the talents of both Mr. Cheadle and Mr. Lumbly, neither one of them would really fit the role of Faye's charming next door neighbor. I think folks are paying way too much attention to the characters depicted on the cover of the book and not enough on how those same characters are actually described in the book. In After The Dance, Carl is described as a man in his early 40's, tall, dark, bearded and with a former athlete's build.

The guy who fits my mental image of Carl is someone a number of you may have never even heard of . . . G. Garvin, the good-looking Black chef who has written a number of cookbooks and whose show "Turn Up The Heat" airs on TVOne. Yes, I know he's not a trained actor, but Mr. Garvin not only has the right look, he has more than enough of the Southern, down-home charm needed to properly pull off a Carl.

A couple of folks have suggested Jennifer Hudson might make a good Faye. While that's not a bad choice, even though she seems kind of young for the part. Were I given a real say in the casting of After The Dance, my first choice for the role of Faye would be Jill Scott. Yep, I think Jilly from Philly could more than handle the role of Faye and she definitely has the look.

A friend who lives in the Cleveland area suggested Jill Marie Jones (who played Toni on Girlfriends) as Nora and I actually think that's an excellent choice. This same friend ( I think she must have led a past life as a casting director) suggested Mel Jackson (who played in Soul Food, the movie, starred in the last season of Living Single and in one of my favorite movies, Uninvited Guest)as Scoobie aka Chef Venard Payne) and I absolutely adore that selection.

When one of the fellas from the Renaissance Men's Book Club at the North Branch of the Memphis Public Library suggested Flava Flav as Carl's Cousin Squirrel, I nearly croaked! LOL. No, I'm guessing Chris Rock's little brother, Tony Rock (from All of Us) would make the perfect Cousin Squirrel.

Well, those would be my picks, but what about you? If you've read After The Dance and you feel like sharing, tell me which actors and actresses you'd like to see playing some of these characters. Also, if you know how I might get in touch with the agents or managers of any of my selections, hook a sister up with the info so I can send them a book! Okay, a girl can dream, can't she? LOL

Old School Hip-Hop . . . Favorites

Believe it or not, one of the things I miss most about living in Memphis and Cleveland, is the opportunity to watch VH1 Soul. Since, in recent years, I've pretty much given up on trying to listen to the radio, VH1 Soul is where I typically hear all of the latest R & B and Hip-Hop releases and checkout the accompanying videos.

Best of all, with VH1 Soul, I can get my urban music fix without having to listening to a bunch of ignorant talk and pseudo-intellectual babble in the process. Unfortunately, my cable provider here in Charlotte doesn't offer the channel (BIG SIGH). So one of the the activities I enjoyed the most over the holidays was sitting for hours on end in front of my parent's big screen TV and zoning out to the vidoes, musicial count-downs and documentaries on VH1 and VH1 Soul.

One of the shows I caught on VH1 (which we do get here in Charlotte) was a count-down of the top 100 greatest Hip Hop songs. Talk about an enjoyable trek back down memory lane. The show made me think about my own list of favorite old school Hip Hop artists. I thought about saving my list for a Thursday Thirteen post, but there were way too many to limit to thirteen. Besides, something tells me the Thursday Thirteen crowd isn't really into Hip Hop, old school, or otherwise (smile). So, in no real order, here it is--

Lori's List of "Old School" Hip Hop Favorites

1) A Tribe Called Quest

2) Da La Soul

3) 3rd Bass

4) Arrested Development

5) Digable Planets

6) Eric B. & Rakim

7) Queen Latifah

8) Mase

9) Dougie Fresh

10) Salt N Pepa

11) Big Daddy Kane

12) Heavy D. & The Boys

13) Public Enemy

14) MC Lyte

15) TLC

16) PM Dawn

17) Brand Nubian

18) Digital Underground

19) Bell, Bev, Devoe

20) Chubb Rock

21) Yo-Yo

22) Grand Master Flash & The Furios Five

23) Pete Rock & C.L. Smooth

24) Lauryn Hill & The Fugees

25) Scarface and The Geto Boys

26) Tupac

27) Biggie

Do we share any favorites? What other old school hip hop artists would make your list?

What? It's 2009?! Well, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Hey, I know I'm late (smile). I just wanted to let you all know I'm still around. I had a great time in Memphis. There's never enough time to see everyone or do everything. My apologies to those I didn't find time to call or visit. I'll catch you on my next run through town. Some of y'all I'm kicking to the curb in 2009 for not even making a half-a$$ attempt to say, "Hey," to a sister. You know who you are (LOL).

ANYWAY, as always, I enjoyed plenty of Memphis style barbecue and blues. I experienced a number of sad, funny and profound moments, some of which I hope to share in the coming days. Also, I've been assessing what worked well for me and what didn't work so well over the last year . . . not only as it pertains to writing and publishing, but relationships too.

I'm a big believer in the line of thought which suggests that if you keep doing the same dang thing and getting the same dang results, perhaps it's time to try a whole new approach (smile). So look for me to do a bit of stretching and house-cleaning in 2009. That's my only resolution for the new year. What about you?

MEMPHIS LOVE . . .

This morning I made an impromptu appearance on live radio! While signing books at Brentano's last night, I made a reconnection with an old classmate from my LeMoyne-Owen College days. Come to find out, my old classmate is the host of his own radio show on KWAM 990 (The New Voice of Memphis). "Tony Todde" is my friend's radio name and it was my pleasure to appear on his hour-long show this morning at 11:00.

A big shout-out to Tony and all of the other Memphians who came out and showed me some love at Brentano's this past Tuesday evening. My Memphis signings have been my favorite and most successful ones, thus far. The homefolks really know how to make a homegirl feel special (smile).

I'll be at Brentano's (Oak Court Mall) again this Saturday (December 27) from 2pm-4pm. If you'd like a signed copy of After The Dance or you'd just like to stop by and say, "Hello," come out out.

Until later . . .

Happy Holidays!

Thursday Thirteen #33 . . . 13 Reading Habits . . .

1) Quite frequently, I'll read the last few pages of a book--just to see how it ends. Seldom does it lessen my enjoyment of the story, nor does it keep me from finishing the book.

2) I love libraries, but I buy more books than I borrow.

3) When I start a hard-back, I generally remove the cover until I've finished reading the book.

4) I've been known to read in the tub.

5) Sometimes I'll read more than one book at a time.

6) Don't ask to borrow one of my books. I hate loaning them out because I know they're not coming back.

7) I prefer reading literary fiction, short story collections and essay collections.

8) I tend to use bookmarks and prefer not to dog-ear the pages of my books.

9) I've been a regular reader of the newspaper since the age of twelve.

10) In recent years, I've stopped subscribing to a daily newspaper and switched to being a weekend only subscriber.

11) Typically, what's popular or on the best sellers lists doesn't interest me.

12) I tend to read books that have been out for a while.

13) On average, I read at least 4 hours a day. Of course, this includes the amount of time I spend reading online.

Do we share any reading habits? Do you have any odd reading habits?

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Thursday Thirteen #32 . . . 13 Christmas / Holiday Traditions (Past & Present)

Baby Boy's 2nd Christmas

from Lori's Picture Collection

1) Shortly after Thanksgiving, I start listening to Christmas music and I don't typically stop until sometime in January. Yeah, not everybody in the fam is down with that, but what can I say? Some of my favorite Christmas cds include--Grover Washington's Breath of Heaven, Boney James' Funky Christmas, the Jackson 5 Christmas Album, Handel's Messiah: A Soulful Celebration (by various artists) and The Best of Vanessa Williams: The Christmas Collection.

2) Putting something in the bell ringers' kettles. I feel guilty when I don't.

3) Participating in Advent ceremonies, festivities and observations.

4) Enlisting my son's help in putting up the Christmas tree.

5) Pulling out and plugging up the Black Santa who dances to Jingle Bell Rock.

6) Mailing Christmas cards.

7) Watching Christmas movies. Charlie Brown Christmas, "Polar Express" and Chevy Chase's "Christmas Vacation" are some of my favorites.

8) Listening to Grover Washington's "Breath of Heaven" at night, by candlelight. One year, while living in Cleveland, the hubby and I lit the candles, opened the curtains and watched it snow while listening to the music.

9) Before our son was born, the hubby and I spent Christmas Eve delivering gifts.

10) After our son was born and while we were living in Memphis, I'd cook a huge pot of chili on Christmas Eve and invite our relatives over for the exhange of gifts.

11) When I lived in Memphis, I'd make a couple of lemon meringue pies for my family's big Christmas dinner. Since my move from Memphis, I've managed to weasel out of this task (smile).

12) Driving around the city after nightfall on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day and taking in all of the beautiful (and/or tacky) Christmas displays and lights.

13) Getting my grub on at my cousin Gertrude's house on Christmas Day.

Well, do we have any traditions in common? Feel free to mention a couple of your own Christmas / Holiday traditions.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants