Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Thursday Thirteen #44 . . . 13 Hairstylists & Hair Salon Pet Peeves

Not unlike, Professor Aliesha Eaton, the main character in my latest novel A Natural Woman, I've had a number of less than pleasant experiences with hairstylists and at hair salons. It is one of the primary reasons, I currently wear my own hair natural and typically do it at home. Hey, I'd rather take a chance on looking crazy, than put up with any of the following . . .

1) Music, conversation or the volume turned up so loud on a TV, I can't hear my own sighs of exasperation. (Even worse are those places where you're treated to a seemingly never-ending blend of the three).

2) The hairstylist who ignores your instructions and styles your hair the way he or she pleases ("What the heck! Now, I know I didn't come in here looking like a chicken, I'll be dang if I leave here looking like one!")

3) Those salons where I'm made to wait 30 minutes to an hour, past my scheduled appointment

4) Hairstylists who tell me WAY more than I care to know about their personal lives (Note, if you have an STD, a crack-habit, a number of crazy folks stalking you or a mole in an unusual place, do me a favor and keep that mess to yourself)

5) Those salons where I highly suspect more than half of the employees are armed, known felons or are listed on some law enforcement agency's most wanted list

6) Stylists who gossip viciously about everybody in the shop, customers and employees alike (Don't worry, I won't be telling you a d@mn thing)

7) Stylists who work on your head like they're weeding a briar patch

8) Stylists who are constantly on the phone, or who routinely hold long, drawn-out, highly animated conversations with other customers and/or hairstylists

9) Salons where arguing, cussing and fighting appear to be the norm

10) Salons where inappropriate movies are shown in color and on the big screen (Look, I am not trying to see anybody's sex tape. Not Paris Hilton's. Not R. Kelley's. Not Screech from Saved By the Bell. And most certainly not your friend or cousin Bay-Bay who lives around the way . . .)

11) Hairstylists who move to a new salon every 4-6 months. (Dang, haven't you ever heard of staying put somewhere and building up your clientele?)

12) Salons where known gang-banger types, petty thieves and girls who work the stroll (don’t act like you don’t know what stroll I’m talking ‘bout) feel free to roam the parking lot and loiter in front of the building

13) Salons where the bootleggers, street vendors and sidewalk evangelists are permitted inside to peddle their wares

Yeah I know, perhaps I need to stay outta the hood and frequent more upscale hair establishments (LOL). But I know I’m not the only one who has ever encountered these kinds of issues.

In any case, if you are a hairstylist, beautician, barber, etc. who has never seen, done or experienced any of the aforementioned, great! I’m obviously, not talking about you or where you work, so please don’t cop an attitude or be offended. In fact, feel free to leave your contact information here in the section for comments . . .

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Adelle Laudan said...

Sometimes it's a blessing to be able to take out my hearing aid and tune things out. LOL For the record, if I had half of those things happen to me, I'd be doing my own hair too. Fun list. Happy T13!

Hazel said...

I can forgive or tolerate the rest, but not no. 2! Luckily I have not encountered these saloon scenes in more than 12 years.

Shelley Munro said...

Wow, your hair salon visits are interesting. I'm glad I had my haircut before I read this. :)

Americanising Desi said...

number 9.. YES YES!

Dear life, 13 things I want today

Hootin' Anni said...

I know what you mean about the music and/or TV. I'm right there with you on that one.

My Thursday's road signs & slogans are posted...come on over if you need some laughter!

Happy 13'ing!!

I am Harriet said...

After years of searching, I have found the hairstylist that works best for me. I make sure that I tip her well.

Happy Thursday!

storyteller at Sacred Ruminations said...

WOW ... Who knew? The smells in most salons give me a headache so I tend to avoid them ;--)
Hugs and blessings,

colleen said...

My biggest fear is that the woman who cuts my hair retires and then I have to chance someone else. Mostly she gets it right.

Sounds like a good setting for a story (and has been).

Chelle said...

I always know I'm going to get a botched job on the days that my regular hairstylist starts talking about her delinquent son-I've learned to make up an excuse for having to leave the salon, immediately.

jillconyers said...

i have a stylist i love. she would get a kick out of this list :)

Katrina said...

Okay, guilty, guilty, on #3. But in my defense to make an appointment with a hairstylist just guarantees your spot. It's like going in for a doctor's visit for an appt. at 10:00 a.m. Very rarely do they see you at exactly that time. When other clients run late they push your schedule further and further behind. Or when clients say they just want a shampoo, and then change their mind to a relaxer or something. All these things put you behind.

But being honest, sometimes stylist might run late for no reason at all. It's what we're known for sadly. But don't give up on finding a good hairstylist, they're out there!!

sherilee said...

I hate being made to wait. Just drives me nuts. Luckily, I've been going to the same stylist for more than 10 years and she's wonderful... and rarely makes me wait!

graywolfie said...

Well..I can't stand stylists who are constantly on the fact I'm worried they'll lose concentration & cut off my ear..hahaa..

Andi said...

I was treated to an extreme case of #2 (a stylist who gave me what he said I needed, not what I wanted) 25 years ago and I'm still emotionally scarred!

Great list!

Debbie @Like a Rose said...

Good grief - you've had some experiences. I'm thankful to say that I've only experienced #1, #2, & #8 personally.

bettye griffin said...

Hilarious! My favorite is #11.