Thursday Thirteen #28 . . . 13 TV Shows I'm Embarrassed to Admit I Watch . . .

I don't watch a lot of television. Never have. But these days, I'm watching even less than in previous years. Frankly, most of the stuff that makes it on the tube either bores me or I find insulting. Yes, I am hard to please and most of the shows I do like, don't stay on for very long and/or a good number of folks find rather odd. Hey, such is life.

The only NEW prime-time series that currently interests me is Life On Mars. It's different enough to hold my attention, though I'm not sure for how long. At the present, the only prime-time series I watch with any degree of faithfulness, outside of NBC's Nightly News, is Brothers and Sisters. Like I already admitted, I'm weird like that (smile).

Even though I don't have any problems owning up to the fact that I enjoy a number of news programs, a variety of music specials and documentaries, as well as shows like HBO's Real Sports and The Wire, the following list is composed of TV shows I'm ashamed to admit, I have actually been known to sit down and watch from beginning to end. Sure, I watch them, but there's only one in the bunch that really has me hooked . . .

1) The First 48: I just started watching this over the summer. So all of the repeats are new to me. I'm not so sure why it fascinates me, other than the fact that I've been able to gain some insights into the minds of criminals and detectives. Perhaps this is research for some future novel? (smile) And of course, I especially enjoy the episodes filmed in Memphis. Gotta give it for the homefolk in the Dirty South.

2) Jon & Kate Plus Eight: Every time my son and I sit down to watch this show, the hubby leaves the room. He doesn't have to worrry, my dreams of having 4-5 kids have long since passed. Besides, watching this crew will most definitely make you think twice about having additional children.

3) Blues Clues: Well, only the reruns featuring my boy, Steve, mind you. This is one of those back down memory lane sorts of things. Blues Clues was the first show I allowed my son to watch as a preschooler.

4) Bridezilla: How these women, (particularly the ones who are tore up, from the floor up, as we used to say back in the day) get away with the crap they pull both amazes and amuses me.

5) The King of Queens: The hubby got me hooked on this over the summer after he talked me into watching an episode with him. Even though I do find the show funny and very well-written, something tells me the hubby identifies just a wee too much with that nit-wit Doug.

6) Divorce Court: While I'll watch any of them, I prefer the reruns with Judge Mabelean. She cracks me up.

7) Real Sex: What can I say, other than it appeals to my inner freak (LOL)?

8) Soul Train: I doubt this one comes as any real surprise. The fact that I'm old school has been well established.

9) Joel Osteen: "Don't drink the Kool-Aid!" is what I used to whisper at my hubby whenever I'd catch him watching a Joel Osteen broadcast. But one day, I sat down and listened for a minute and even though I'm still a little leery of dude's smile, I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

10) Inside Edition: Mainly, I watch this show in order to get my entertainment news and because I'm generally too lazy to get up after the evening news goes off.

11) Buy Me: Since in recent years it always seems like I'm in the process of either buying or selling a house, this show appeals to me.

12) Funniest Home Videos: Just call me a sucker for silly cat, dog and baby videos.

13) Oprah: It's only been in recent years that I've become ashamed of being such a hardcore Oprah fan. But yes, I've watched her show ever since it hit the airwaves One of the best things about living in Charlotte is that Opie's show is repeated in the evenings, so I don't ever have to worry about having to record or miss a show. But don't worry, you'll never catch me on one of her "favorite things" give-away specials screaming like an idiot. That's so uncool (LOL). I also don't typcially don't bother to watch the show when she's doing her in-depth celebrity interviews. Sorry, celebrities just aren't my thing, unless, of course, we're talking about somebody like, PRINCE!

So what shows do you watch that might surprise those who THINK they know you?

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Quotes That Make You Go, "Hmm . . . "

I'd like to thank one of my Old School Mix visitors and Goodreads Friends, Damika, for introducing me to the following quote by Quincy Jones:

"The tradgedy of Tupac is that his untimely passing is representative of too many young Black men in this country . . . If we had lost Oprah Winfrey at 25, we would have lost a relatively unknown, local market TV anchorwoman. If we had lost Malcolm X at 25, we would have lost a hustler named Detroit Red. And if I had left the world at 25, we would have lost a big-band trumpet player and aspiring composer--just a sliver of my eventual life potential" (Quincy Jones)

Doesn't that make you think? Not just about the lives of talented celebrities like Pac or Oprah, but ordinary folk, like yourself? We live in a society that appears to worship youth, money, popularity and little else and personally, I think that's unfortunate. Tupac was young, good-looking, popular, talented and doing better than most of us ever will financially, but we'll never know what else he could have been or accomplished. We'll never know his true potential or genius.

Isn't the same true for any us? Had you died at age 25 how might it have impacted the lives of the folks nearest and dearest to you? Moreover, what might you NOT have accomplished, seen to fruition or watched come to pass? What lessons or opportunities migh you have missed had you died at 25? Or for those one or two of you who have yet to reach that grand ole age (smile), what if your time had come at age 19?

A few of the things I would have missed had I breathed my last breath at age 25 include:

*not being able to see my still healthy, alert and funny grandfather live well into his '90s;

*being married to my college sweetheart for more years that I care to announce on this blog (smile)

*bringing another life into the world and watching him grow into the smart, handsome and vibrant young man that he is today;

*publishing my first newspaper article, my first magazine article, my first short story and my first novel;

*helping one of my oldest and dearest friends through the end of her 17 year marriage;

*accompanying my husband through the removal of a cyst from his brain;

*witnessing the joy and delight my parents take in being grandparents.

What about you? What sort of life enriching experiences might you have missed had you departed this world at 25? What gifts or talents might you have missed out on sharing with the rest of the world?

Thursday Thirteen #27 . . . 13 Bad News Neighbor Types . . .

Note: I posted this last week, but when the date on the Thursday Thirteen web site never changed, I pulled the post. Hopefully, all will go well this week (smile). Comments are welcome!

Since I've been an adult, I've lived in three homes and six different apartments and/or townhomes. At one point, we were moving around so much, my folks started calling me and the hubby the gypsies. So, I've lived in a lot of different neighborhoods and had both the pleasure and the displeasure of getting to know a variety of neighbors. The following are some of the more . . . memorable.

1) The Loud Music Lovers--All right! If I have to hear the theme to the Beverly Hillbillies and/or Working Nine To Five, on blast one more time . . .

2) The Anti-Lawn Care Crew--You mean to tell me there are six of y'all living over there and don't none of y'all know how to use a lawnmower!?

3) The Dope Fiends--When it comes to the neighborhood crack house, at least you know where it is. But as the hubby likes to say, the bad thing about living next door to a meth-lab is that you usually don't know that sucker is there until it blows up.

4) The Cat Lady and/or the Dog Man--Umm, why is it that the nice ole lady who lives with the 15 cats always wants to bring you home-made goodies?

5) The Good Time Gal--Look, if you're skanky enough to sit out on your patio in the wee hours of the morning, boo-hooing into your beer about all the men you done did or let do ya (below my bedroom window, no less) don't get mad if my hubby yanks up the window and yells down for you to pipe down and take your stank butt to bed. Personally, I'da told you to wash first, but that's just me.

6) The Nosey-Butt--Why is it that every time I break out my barbecue grill or I'm getting ready to add something to my landscaping or I'm talking to a contractor, you've got to bring your nosey-butt over and see what's up?

7) The Thief--My uncle shared this one with me. He said one night his shed got broken into and some of his lawn equipment was stolen. A couple of days later, he hears what sounds like HIS lawn mower. (Hey, he swears he knows what his lawn mower sounds like). Anyway, he peeps over the fence and spies the neighbor, the one who belongs to the Anti-Lawn Care Crew, out there cutting his grass with what looks like my uncle's stolen lawn mower.

8) The Broke Down Car Bunch--Dag man, whatcha doing over there, running a chop shop? Can't you do something about all those rusted out cars and engines you've got in your yard sitting up on bricks, providing shelters and playgrounds for cats and rodents?

9) The Chain Smoker--Tell me this, how is it that you can keep your car so spic and span, I'm saying, be outside bright and early on a Sunday morning washing that bad boy, but you've got so many durn cigarette butts in your yard, it looks like two inches worth of accumulated snow and it's the middle of July?

10) The Folks Who Fight--Okay, here's a thought, why don't y'all find yourselves a boxing ring or sign up to be guests on The Jerry Springer Show and get that mess out of your systems? A relative once told me, one of his neighbors called the woman he was living with out of her name so often, he (my relative) just knew the couple's poor kid was gonna grow up thinking his mama's name was either bit@h or ho'.

11) The Lovers--Okay, enough with the bedroom gymnastics already! If you must got at it like elk, why not get rid of the loose head board and the old box springs or better yet, just toss the mattresses on the floor so I don't have to hear all of that racket?

12) The Folks With The Bad-A$$ Kids--To the parents, care-takers and or guardians of the bad-a$$ kids. Look, I know it's hard. So why not just pack your bags and let them have the house? Hell, they're tearing it down around you anyway.

13) The Nut-Case--True story. We once lived next door to a fool who got a kick out of feeding the neighborhood raccoons. He said he found it therapeutic. Okay, fine. The only problem was after eating their fill on Mr. Nut Case's balcony, the nasty-a$$ critters would come over and take a crap on ours. When we asked Mr. Nut Case to stop, he said we were being mean and kept right at it. When we complained to management, Mr. Nut Case accused us of putting sugar in his gas tank. After the hubby started talking about getting a gun, I agreed it was time to move.

Okay, so who lives in your neighborhood? (LOL) Have you ever have to deal with any characters like these?

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A Few Thoughts On . . . The "Black" Bookstore Section Debate . . .

Okay, let me just confess up front, that I've deliberately avoided sharing my views on this "hot topic" for reasons which, if you continue reading, will become readily apparent (smile).

Basically, I view the Black book store section as a marketing strategy that has long worked in favor of African American authors and readers of our work. As the story I shared in a previous post suggests (See Here), I enjoy both browsing in bookstores and reading the work of African American authors. The Black bookstore section makes it easier for me to find my favorites as well as discover work by authors with whom I'm less familiar.

While I can understand why some might feel this strategy has out-lived its usefulness, I'm not so sure shelving all of our books alongside the books of White & Other mainstream authors is necessarily the Best or the Only solution to what some folks in recent years have come to view as a Problem. Certainly, if there is a section in the bookstore set aside for mystery, then African American writers of mystery ought to be in that section. The same, I think, should be true of romance, sci-fi and other such well-defined genres.

But I have serious doubts about the notion of there being a financial benefit to all of our books being shelved in with the general population. I think for many African American authors, especially new and lesser known ones, the exact opposite would be true. Why do I say that? Well, for one, folks like me, who like to browse, would be doing a whole lot less of it. If you're a debut author and your book is shelved in among the millions of other books in the store, chances are, I'm not gonna stumble upon you.

As a debut author myself, what I want more than anything when it comes to bookstores is VISIBILITY. That means, number one, I want to be IN the bookstore, which can be a battle itself, even if one is traditionally published. (Believe me, I could tell you some interesting/horror stories, not just about the chains, but the smaller "Black" bookstores too). And number two, I want to be some place where folks, who are interested, or just might be, can readily find me.

And to those who might ask, "Well, don't you see the importance of courting a non-Black readership, too?" my response, "What makes you think I don't?" (smile). I value ALL of my readers and I'm open to sharing my work and discussing it with any and everyone. Just yesterday, a friend, who just so happens to be Indian (from India) called and told me how much fun she had discussing my book with a friend of hers. At my last bookstore signing, the only copies of After The Dance I sold were to White women. And get this, about a month or so ago, a predominately White bible study group read and discussed my work (LOL). Yes, there is quite a story behind that last example and no, my book isn't Christian fiction.

What I've discovered is that the people who truly want to read my book will . . . and oddly enough, they seem to know how and where to find it--whether in the bookstore or elsewhere (smile). Yes, I am being somewhat sarcastic, but that's only because I've begun to sense that underlying SOME of the current angst about the African American bookstore section is a desire to stamp certain forms of African American literature as "less than." For the record, I don't think my work will be tainted if it sits on a shelf next to the latest street lit author, any more than I believe it will be elevated somehow if it sits on the shelf alongside a book by Morrison or Atwood. Nor do I view the Black bookstore section, as so many others apparently do, as some sort of waste-land or rat and roach infested ghetto. Sorry, I just don't.

Yes, there is plenty of what I'd call garbage out there, not just in the Black book store section, hell, all over the dang bookstore. But that's the beauty of life and being able to make choices. As I've stated elsewhere in the Old School Mix, one person's 10 day old cabbage is quite often another's manna from heaven. So, no, I don't really have any problems with my work being shelved in the "Black" section of the bookstore.

Now, on the other hand, what I don't care for so much is all of our books being labeled, "urban." I'm sure for some, this is the same issue, but for me, it's a trickier matter of semantics. Not every book written by a Black author is necessarily "urban" in either tone or feel or subject matter. I have a friend who writes historical fiction, primarily from the Civil War period and recently while wandering through the bookstore, I saw a stack of his books on a table marked, "Urban fiction." Clearly, my friend's work is anything but "urban."

But you wanna know some even bigger pet peeves of mine? Bookstores owned by Black folks who offer little beyond street lit and erotica and mainstream publishers who have apparently decided that the aforementioned are ALL we read. Now, until some folks are willing to discuss those kinds of issues in an open, honest and zealous fashion, there's not a whole lot more I care to say about the buying, selling and marketing of books by African American authors . . .

Hold Up, Wait A Minute! A FREE Audio Sample of After The Dance . . .

I guess I started tooting my horn a little too soon (see previous post) because today I discovered the audio version of After The Dance is now available via Amazon.com.

The actors (Caroline Clay & Ezra Knight) who read the work do an EXCELLENT job. If you'd like to listen, a FREE audio sample is available HERE. (Just press the listen button and you'll hear both Carl & Faye at no charge).

Now, if you're interested in purchasing the download, Amazon is runing a promotional special for only $29.79!

Wow! I've never been a big fan of audio books, but now that I've heard a sample, you know I can't wait to listen to mine (LOL). Oh, and I absolutely LOVE the cover on the audio version. No, it's not how I picture the characters, but it conveys so much warmth and tenderness. Beautiful! Job well done!

Horn-Tooting Links . . .

The following is a link to an article about me that appeared a couple of Sundays ago in the Charlotte Observer: "SoMeck writer sets appearances." One small correction though, even though I am from Memphis, I relocated to Charlotte from the Cleveland area. I know, it's confusing (smile).

Did you know After The Dance was available on the Kindle reader? See Amazon.com for details.

The audio version of After The Dance recently went on sale. A digital version is available via Griot Audio (an imprint of the Recorded Books Library Site) on something called a Playaway for the tidy sum of $56.75. If that's too rich for your blood, why not ask your local library to make it available for all of your area's library users?

You may still be able to pick up signed copies of After The Dance at the following locations: The Barnes & Noble (The Arboretum Shopping Center, Charlotte, NC); Joseph-Beth BookSellers (SouthPark Mall, Charlotte, NC); Park Road Books (Park Road Shopping Center, Charlotte, NC); The BookMark (Uptown, Charlotte, NC): Joseph-Beth BookSellers (Legacy Village Shopping Center, Lyndhurst, OH); and possibly SeneAfrique in Cleveland, OH.

Actually, at last report there was only one signed copy of After The Dance left at SeneAfrique. But the African arts store is still worth a visit anyway, if you're in the area (smile). Here's a link to a recent Cleveland Plain Dealer interview with one of the owners, Waly Sene.

Hand Selling & Pitch Preferences . . .

What turns you off as a consumer? What type of pitch approach works best for you?

Not long ago, I was in a bookstore browsing in the section set aside for"African American" fiction when one of the bookstore employees walked over and asked if needed help finding anything in particular. When I told her no, I was looking, she made an interesting comment. She said, "You know a lot of this stuff is garbage."

Now, had I not agreed, the conversation might have taken an ugly turn (LOL), but since so much of stuff showing up the "African American" fiction shelves these days makes me grimace and shake my head, she got no argument from me. For the sake of full disclosure, let me just add that I'd also had a successful book-signing in this same bookstore the day before this particular conversation took place.

Anyway, the bookstore employee went on to give me a glowing and detailed review of a book by an African American author that she'd absolutely adored. When I asked the middle-aged White woman what had prompted her to read a novel by an African American author and that had something of an "urban" storyline, she'd laughed and said, she felt a certain obligation as someone in the book business to read beyond and outside the realm of "dead White authors."

I nodded, listened and took note, in part because I'd heard/read good things about this same author's work elsewhere. Even though on that particular day, I ended up purchasing a different title, I won't soon forget the bookstore employee's enthusiastic sales pitch and I'm sure at some point, I will check out the novel she recommended.

A number of things generally play into my decision to buy or not buy a book. At the top of my list are factors like recommendations, reviews and excerpts. I pay particular attention to the recommendations of folks whose reading taste are similar to mine. If I keep hearing about a book or seeing mentions of it everywhere, I'll typically go online and take a look at some of the reviews written by both customers and bonafide book critics. If I've never read the author's work before, I generally make an attempt to read an excerpt before I make a final decision.

The bookseller's approach worked well for me because she soft-pedaled her pitch and made an effort to both ascertain my tastes and engage me in polite conversation. What doesn't work so well for me is the hard-sell or what I've come to view as the "hustle man" approach.

Pitch turn-offs for me, include the following:

Shoving a book in my face or hands and saying something along the lines of this, "This here is the bomb! You really do need to buy/ read/check this out today!;

Hounding me, chasing me, or following me around with a book while I'm browsing in a bookstore, at a festival or while I'm out in the grocery store parking lot;

Questioning my intelligence, racial solidarity, spiritual integrity, sanity, willingness to help a brother or sister out, etc.;

Bombarding me with notices (email, snail, etc.) about your latest book, literary endeavor and/or accomplishment, but never attempting to engage me otherwise. I mean, an email just to say hello, how ya doing or a comment on my blog every now and then wouldn't hurt;

Turning up at somebody else's event, uninvited, for the specific purpose of hustling me and the other guests with your literary wares;

Authors who under the guise of marketing and promotion-- boast, brag and otherwise act like they're the best thing to hit the scene since barbecued beans and chicken wings.

I do understand and appreciate that some of the items on my "turn-off" list don't bother others. We're all different and that's a beauty thing (smile). I'm also certain that to some my comments will mark me as a snob or some kind of an elitist. Oh well . . . go ahead and hate me for thinking books deserve better than to be hawked like crack, stolen sneakers or bootleg dvds (LOL). Really, all I'm doing is sharing my preferences and trying to get a better sense for how others go about making that decision to fork over their hard-earned dollars for a book. What say you?

The Warrensville, OH Public Library Pics . . . From The Reading & Discussion of After The Dance

Yeah, I know, this event took place way back in July and I'm just now getting around to posting the pics! What? Can't a sister be busy? Anyway, my son took most of these pictures and I think he did a fairly decent job.

I truly enjoyed my visit to the Warrensville Public Library. Not only did I finally get to meet Emanuel Carpenter of Thumper's Corner (AALBC) fame, but I was also treated to my first real taste of in-the-flesh feedback. It's simultaneously an odd, humbling and heady experience when folks you don't know show up at one of your events in order to express their praise and appreciation of your work.

Again, I'd like to thank Elayne Jackson for insisting that I visit the branch and for making it all happen. Also, my hat goes off to Mr. Carpenter who drove all the way from Westlake in order to assist me with a reading of After The Dance. Not only is Emanuel an excellent writer, he is an all around cool and level-headed guy. He's been toiling in the background for a few years now, but I have no doubt that he's destined to make a BIG SPLASH on the literary scene one day soon.

Lori & Emanuel

Giving Voice to "Carl & Faye"

At The Warrensville, OH Public Library

From Lori's Picture Collection

July 2008

Emanuel Carpenter & Lori Johnson

at the Warrensville, OH Public Library

From Lori's Picture Collection

July 2008

Lori Chatting With A New Fan

At The Warrensville Public Library

From Lori's Picture Collection

July 2008

A Reader Shares Her Opinion

at the Warrensville, OH Public Library

From Lori's Picture Collection

July 2008

Lori With Library Staff Memebers (Elayne & Aaron)

at the Warrensville, OH Public Library

From Lori's Picture Collection

July 2008

Thursday Thirteen #26 . . . Last 13 Books I've Read . . .

There just isn't the time to read as much as I'd like or even as much as I did only a couple of years ago. These days I'm too busy writing, marketing or skimming other things (like magazines, newspapers or blogs) to even garner the energy it takes to hunker down with a good book. As painful as it is to admit, sometimes I'll go for weeks, without reading a single book and typically, I don't even finish half of the books I start.

But as the following list suggests, when I do find the time and the engery, I'm very much an eclectic reader. Even though I lean decidedly toward literary fiction, I'm pretty open to some of everything. If you'll look closely, you'll find on my list books by women, men, African Americans, Canadians, dead authors, etc. You will also find a bit of poetry, a couple of essay collections, a mystery, a childrens' book and a love story, penned by none other than yours truly (smile).

While visiting Cleveland in July, I met a young Black woman who'd only recently started reading books that weren't written by African Americans. She said when she'd bring home the non-African American titles, some of her friends & family members would tease her about her reading selections. My jaw dropped when I heard that. The thought that anyone might actually limit themselves to a certain type of book, based on someone else's opinion astounds me. Why limit yourself or care. The world is full of all kinds of books. When it comes to reading, just like eating, the joy for me is sampling a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

Anyway, the following list is in no particular order, but I believe it's a fairly accurate accounting of the books I've read (from cover to cover) over the past year or so.

1) Trading Dreams At Midnight (Diane McKinney Whetstone)

2) Savoring The Salt: The Legacy of Toni Cade Bambara (Linda J. Holmes & Cheryl Wall, editors)

3) Family Bible (Melissa J. Delbridge)

4) I Wish I Had A Red Dress (Pearl Cleage)

5) Diary of A Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules (Jeff Kinney)

6) No Time To Die (Grace F. Edwards)

7) The Last Days of Dogtown (Anita Diamant)

8) Wise Blood (Flannery O'Connor)

9) Moral Disorder: And Other Stories (Margaret Atwood)

10) After The Dance (Lori Johnson)

11) Weather Central (Ted Kooser)

12) D'Aulaires' Book of Greek Myths (Ingri & Edgar Parin d'Aulaire)

13) Deep Sightings and Rescue Missions: Fiction, Essays and Conversations (Toni Cade Bambara)

What was the last book you read? Have you read any of the titles on my list?

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Birthdays . . . Who Has One On The Same Day As Yours?

While listening to the radio this morning, I learned that the following three individuals were all born on September 13: Tavis Smiley, Tyler Perry and Iyanla Vanzant. Interesting, huh? Well, it is to me, particularly because my father also celebrates a birthday on September 13 and he shares quite a few of the personality traits & quirks (both good & bad) of the three aformentioned celebrities (smile).

I have a birthday in September as well. No, not on the 13th, even though my Mom says she was hoping to have me on that day, if only so she could give me to my Dad as a gift he wouldn't soon forget. But I guess the Muse-Maker had a slightly different plan because my entry into the land of the living didn't come until 10 days later, on September 23rd.

I'm honored to share a birthday with none other than John Coltrane. As I've mentioned, more than once in the OSM, thanks to my Dad, I grew up listening to 'Trane's music. Long before I knew we shared a birthday, I had an interest in him and his work. Based on what I've read, I'd dare say Mr. Coltrane and I have a number of things in common--though, none of which, besides our love for music, I'm fixing to share here with you today (LOL).

But what about you? Do you share a birthday with someone well-known, whether famous or infamous? If so, do you think you have anything in common with that person? Do tell.

Thursday Thirteen #25 . . . 13 Unfortunate Talk Show & Reality TV Truths . . .

Before we dive into the list, let me just put it out there, I'm not a fan of too many talk or so-called reality tv shows. It wasn't always that way. Back in the day, I couldn't get enough of The Real World. I even watched a couple of seasons of Survivor and Big Brother. I'll even admit that every now and then, for laughs, I'd tune into Springer or Maury, but it didn't take long for all of that mess to get OLD.

I'm saying, to each his or her own, but, for me, most of these shows have become so predictable, senseless, exploitive and uncreative, I fail to see the point of watching. I mean really, don't we all pretty much recognize the following scenarios?

1) If two 300 plus pound women are fighting over a guy, the fella in question is sure to be skinny, unemployed and/or in need of extensive dental work.

2) If there's a drunk in the "reality" house, there's sure to be plenty of gratuitous cussing, fighting, vomiting and other overly gross and graphic losses of bodily functions before the season's end.

3) If she's dressed in a French maid outfit, punctuating every other sentence with "girlfriend" while owning an Adam's apple as big as a baby's fist, she's probably a man.

4) If her hair-do is jacked up, hacked up or a right hot mess, her attitude probably is too.

5) If there are more than 3 attractive individuals in the "reality" house, the expectation is--two or more of them will hook-up for at least one session of hot and heavy boot-knocking.

6) If his mama, sister, auntie, play cousin or any combination of the aforementioned are on the show boisterously defending his behind, he's probably a dead-beat daddy, been locked up more than a time or two and/or is trifling as all get out.

7) If she's willing to kiss Flava Flav in the mouth, she'd probably kiss a dog square in the butt for a sum between $200 - $500.

8) If she's blonde, big-breasted and an airhead, she probably won't be among the first kicked or voted out of the "reality" house.

9) If there's a Blk man in the "reality" house, he will undoubtedly fall into one of the following stereotypes--"the angry Blk man," "the funny Blk man" or "the overly sexed Blk man" (who in the hell casts these shows anyway, David Duke and his crew?)

10) If she's weeping and wailing, hyperventilating or doing a Holy Ghost dance, she's either just been informed that the baby ain't his or she's somehow ended up on Oprah's Favorite Things Give-Away Show.

11) If his shoes are pink, purple, orange or red and he's wearing an outfit in the same color, he's either a preacher, a pimp or a circus clown.

12) If any of her kids are named Barcardi, Courvoisier, Alize, Chivas, Martini or in honor of any other brand or type of liquor, she more than likely isn't certain who the baby daddy is.

13) If the kid is barely 3 years of age, weighs close to 100 lbs or more and is on the show scarfing down doughnuts or big boy burgers with bacon & extra cheese or a tub of buffalo wings and all while clad in an adult-sized diaper, his Mama 'Nem and the talk show host/moderator are all big-time enablers who need to be getting the child in question some help rather than allowing him/her to be so blantantly exploited.

Hey, don't get mad at me. I just call 'em like I see 'em (LOL). So, do you have any reality show and/or talk show truths you'd like to add? If so, have at it!

SeneAfrique . . . Pictures From My Visit On July 25, 2008 . . .

Mary Oluonye , Lori Johnson

& Guest

at SeneAfrique / July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

Mary Oluonye (pronounced alone-yay) and her husband, Waly Sene are the proud owners of SeneAfrique Trading Company, located at 12206 Larchmere Boulevard, Cleveland OH 44120. Upon learning of my pending visit to the Cleveland area, Ms. Oluonye, who is also a Shaker Heights librarian, invited me to her store and graciously hosted a reception in my honor.

If you are ever in the Cleveland area, I strongly encourage you to visit SeneAfrique. The section of Larchmere upon which the store sits is home to a number of quaint businesses, antique shops and eateries and has a distinct "artsy" feel about it. The store itself offers a wide variety of imported African art, crafts, clothing and other cultural items. In addition to author signings, the owners intend to host art exhibits and other cultural events which promote African & African-American culture.

I had a great time at SeneAfrique and definitely plan to visit again the next time I'm in the area. The following are a few of the pictures from my July 2008 signing in the cozy little courtyard behind SeneAfrique. Just so you know, I'm the one in the hat (smile).

Lori's Visit to SeneAfrique

July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

Lori Signing After The Dance

in SeneAfrique's Courtyard

July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

SeneAfrique

July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

My Reading in SeneAfrique's

Courtyard

July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

Thursday Thirteen #24 . . . 13 Memorable Food Moments . . .

Baby Boy's First Meal Out

from Lori's Picture

Collection

For me, the smell, taste and even the sight of certain foods conjure memories--some good, some bad. The following are some of my most memorable food moments.

1). Hot tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches on a crisp fall or winter day

2) My Dad's stove popped popcorn, which he served to me and my younger brother in those little brown lunch bags

3) My M'Deah's homemade ice-cream on the 4th of July

4) The beautiful cake the hubby surprised me with upon my winning first place in a short story contest

5) My son's first restaurant meal--pancakes at the IHOP (see picture above)

6) The sight of chitlins soaking in the sink and the overpowering stench of them simmering in a huge pot on the stove

7) My grandfather standing out in the cold and barbecuing ribs under his carport in November just so my little brother could get one of his birthday wishes (a dinner of barbecued ribs) fulfilled.

8) Munching on candied apples, corn dogs and cotton candy at the Mid-South Fair

9) Gagging on okra at the dinner table when I was 3 or 4

10) The hamburgers my Aunt Doris would fry for us some Saturday evenings

11) Cooking and serving my grandmother one of her favorite meals--macaroni and cheese and fried chicken

12) My grandmother's sweet potato pie on Thanksgiving Day

13) The first time I ever prepared a meal of salad, baked potato, grilled steak and iced tea for the man I later married

Well, what about you? Do you have one or two memorable food moments you'd like to share?

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Series And/Or Sequels . . . What's Your Take?

Late last week, I got a call from an old friend who works in a hair salon. She and some of her customers had been discussing my novel After The Dance and wanted to know when they could expect the sequel or part II. These ladies were serious as all get out and even had a list of things they wanted me to do in the next book (LOL).

Okay, a part of me fully understands and appreciates where they're coming from. The truth is, I deliberately left a few things hanging/unresolved at the end of After The Dance. Why? Well, primarily because tidy (everyone lives happily ever after) endings make me GAG, but also because a small part of me felt the need to leave open the possibility of doing something else with these characters.

For the record, I'm not a big fan of sequels or serials, when it comes to books or movies. It's been my experience that most of the time the follow-ups aren't anywhere near as enjoyable or entertaining as the first ones anyway. So I'm saying, besides the potential financial gain, what's the point? Yeah, I know for some folks, that's the only point (smile).

Anyway, my son reads a lot of stuff with dragons, wizards, fantasy and the like and lately, just about every book he drags into the house is part of some 6-book, 12-book or 20-book series. Dang! What's up with that? No, I didn't read the Nancy Drew series as a kid and not more than a couple of the Three Detective series. Okay, I did sorta kind get into the Henry Huggins and Beezus crew. But as an adult, I can barely stand the thought of reading about the same set of characters for more than one--possibly two books. In addition to boring the hell out of me, writing about the same jokers book after book after book would no doubt turn me into a raving lunatic.

So, while I listened to my friend and her customers' advice and laughed at some of their suggestions, I didn't make any promises. I do love the characters in After The Dance and I probably wouldn't mind writing about them again . . . at some point . . . in the future. But for now, I'm still weighing all of the pluses and minuses.

What do you think about sequels and/or serials in general? Do you love them? Hate them? Can take or leave them? If you've read After The Dance would you like to read about those same characters again? If so, which characters and what sort of things would you like to see me do with them?

Charlotte Author . . . CHERIS HODGES . . . An Old School Mix Q & A . . .

Cheris Hodges

Joseph-Beth (Charlotte, NC)

Fall 2006

from Lori's Picture Collection

The following is an interview I snagged with the talented and driven, yet humble and extremely nice Cheris Hodges. Ms. Hodges is a journalist and and author who hails from Bennettsville, South Carolina, but who currently works and resides in Charlotte, North Carolina.

I don't mind admitting that I'm a bit envious and in total awe of Cheris' ability to churn out one novel after another. She's written and published an impressive eight titles since 2001, the most recent, Let's Get It On (Kensington/Dafina) tumbled onto the shelves a couple of weeks ago.

Tell us about your latest novel. My latest novel, Let's Get It On, is a story that I had a lot of fun writing because I got to talk football! In this novel, fictional Wide Receiver Maurice Goings is on top of the world. His team just won the Super Bowl and he's about to get married in a lavish wedding. But his bride jilts him at the altar. Maurice and his brother James take his honeymoon at a singles resort and while he's there, Maurice runs into Kenya Taylor, the woman whos heart he broke nearly a decade ago.

Kenya doesn't want anything to do with him, but she knows that she's going to have to face him because after her vacation is over, she's moving to Charlotte, the same city Maurice lives in.

Sparks fly between the two, but is Kenya willing to give Maurice a second chance?

I know you've written and published a number of novels--eight to be exact. How are you able to be so prolific while maintaining a day job that also requires you to write? About 20 cups of coffee a day. (LOL) I love to write. I think it's just in my blood. Sometimes I'd rather be writing than hanging out with friends or going out and enjoying a lot of the nightlife in Charlotte. When I start a story, I connect with the characters and I have to finish it. I also love journalism. I used to think I was going to be a real life version of Lois Lane, but there is no Superman to save me, so I have to keep myself out of trouble.

Have you ever considered writing outside of the romance genre? If so, what other type of writing might you consider in the future?I would love to write a mystery. I've started on a few and I have a few mainstream fiction projects that I've worked on as well. My first book, Searching For Paradise, wasn't a romance and I'd like to revisit those characters.

What has been the most difficult or challenging aspect of maintaining a career as an author? With the price of gas, sky high, getting to book signings is a problem. I'd love to go all over the world and to every store that has a Cheris Hodges book, but I can't.

Who do you read? Or, do you even have time to read? I love Phillip Margolin. He writes legal thrillers. Brenda Jackson is another of my favorites. I have to make time to read because the more you read, the better writer you become.

What are some of the biggest mistakes you think new writers/authors make? I think the biggest mistake we make is, we think once the book is on the shelves, the work is over. It's just beginning when your book is in stores among thousands of others.

What one/single picece of writing and/or marketing advice has helped you the most? Never give up. I got a lot of no's before I heard one yes. I took all of that rejection in stride and promised myself that I would do everything I could to sell books.

Are you working on anything new? If so, are you at liberty to share? My next book, More Than He Can Handle, will be out in February. Here's what the back cover says:

HE'S ONE MISTAKE SHE PLANS TO FORGET

As maid-of-honor to a friend who's gone Bridezilla, Winfred "Freddie" Barker is dealing with minute-to-minute drama from her crazy-extravagant wedding. So when the ceremony is over and the reception starts heating up, Freddie blows off steam with a little champagne--and a lot of the best man, Cleveland Alexander. It was definitely going to be just a one-night fling, 'cause no woman in her right mind would fall for that man's arrogant, self-centered self, no matter how caramel-fine he is . . .

SHE'S THE ONE WOMAN HE CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT

As a hard-core bachelor, Cleveland Alexander was strictly all about beddin' and forgettin'. And the only reason he let Ms. Winfred Barker call his bluff was to put her stuck-up attitude in check. But once he sees how complicated and caring she really is, he'll do anything to help solve her problems--and convince her that the love between this is a lifetime of real . . .

I have to thank one of my readers and friends, Louise Brown for inspiring me to write about Cleveland Alexander. His brother, Darren, was a character in my novel, The Business of Love.

Is there anything else you'd like readers to know about you? If I could have anything in the world, it would be a 1967 Mustang Fastback, baby blue.

Thanks Cheris for taking time out of your busy schedule in order to answer a few questions in the Old School Mix. As hard as you work, something tells me you may be closer to that baby blue Mustang than you think (smile).

The following is a list of Cheris' other titles: Searching for Paradise (2001); Revelations (2003); Cautious Heart (2004, reissued in 2008); A Love of Her Own (2005); Second Chances At Love (2006); The Business of Love (2006); Just Can't Get Enough (2007) and Let's Get It On (August 2008).

If you' like to read more about Cheris or read excerpts of her work, visit her web site: http://www.cherishodges.com/

More Cleveland Pictures . . . from the Joseph-Beth Signing . . . of After The Dance . . .

Okay, here are a few more pictures from my signing of After The Dance at the Joseph-Beth Bookstore in Lyndhurst, Ohio (a suburb of Cleveland). Yes, I am rocking the Rebecca from Sunny-Brook Farm hat (A cousin gave one of my hats this tag years ago / LOL) 'cause the hair ain't tight. Next time I'll just leave the holiday hair in the salon and rock it NATURAL like I do when I'm at home (smile).

Lori & "The Cleveland Crew"

at signing of

After The Dance

Joseph-Beth (Legacy Village /Lyndhurst, OH)

July 2008

*from Lori's Picture Collection*

Lori laughing it up with some

Cleveland Church Members

at signing of

After The Dance

Joseph-Beth (Legacy Village / Lyndhurst OH)

July 2008

*from Lori's Picture Collection*

Lori & Cleveland Relatives

at signing of

After The Dance

Joseph-Beth (Legacy Village / Lyndhurst, OH)

July 2008

*From Lori's Picture Collection*

Lori & A Few New Friends

After The Dance (signing)

Joseph-Beth (Legacy Village / Lyndhurst, OH)

July 2008

*from Lori's Picture Collection*

Slavery & The Civil War . . . A Personal Connection . . .

This past Saturday afternoon, instead of turning on The Best of Soul Train and spending an hour reliving the '70s, I tuned into a segment of CSPAN'S BOOKTV and allowed myself to be taken even further back in history. How far? Well, the US Civil War period, to be exact.

The program I made a point of watching this past Saturday on CSPAN's BookTV featured a segment on Andrew Ward and the material in his new book. Mr. Ward is an author & scholar who has researched the US Civil War recollections of former slaves and compiled some of his findings in a book entitled The Slaves' War: The Civil War in the Words of Former Slaves (Houghton Mifflin).

Mr. Ward's research is right down my alley. I love read, studying and listening to oral histories and only wish I had more time in which to immerse myself in such pursuits. One of the best things I ever did (years ago, before I got so darned busy and my story-telling grandmother got seriously ill) was sit down with my M'Deah and record her recollections of our family's history in an area of South Memphis (Whitehaven) known as Johnson Subdivision (Johnson Sub, for short). Without those cassette tape recordings, which I later transcribed, I may have never known about my own family's involvement in the Civil War.

As luck or fate would have it, my grandmother had lived in close proximity to her grandparents, interacted with them on a regular basis and knew a number of details about Margaret and Charlie Cannon, whom she affectionally referred to as "Grandma and Grandpa."

Charles Cannon (or Charlie Cannon as my grandmother called him), was a name I'd stumbled aross years later, long after my grandmother had passed and while I was in the public library one day, trying to find information on another one of my ancestors, the man and former slave said to have founded Johnson Sub, Prince Johnson. One of my great aunts had told me that Prince, who was her grandfather (and my great-great grandfather) had served in the Civil War. So, I'd been researching pension records trying to document Prince's service in the Union Army when I came across the pension record of a one Charles Cannon.

All of the details in the Colored Man's Application for Pension, which had been filed on April 11, 1927 (approximately sixty-two years after the Civil War) made me think he just might be the "Grandpa" or "Charlie Cannon" of whom my M'Deah had spoken so fondly, but I KNEW he was "my" Charlie when I saw his wife's name "Margaret."

But most shocking to me was that the five page document--witnessed, notarized and signed with his "X" contains extensive details of Charlie's service alongside his owner James (Jim) Cannon in the 154th Tennessee Infantry Regiment Company B of the Confederate Army.

Yes, y'all, my great-great grandfather, a former slave by the name of Charles Cannon served in the Confederate Army and two years before his death in 1929, drew a pension for his service. Truth is, indeed, stranger than fiction sometimes, ain't it?! (LOL).

What do I make of Charlie Cannon's service in the Confederate Army? Well, he was a SLAVE owned by a one James Cannon. To be honest, I don't really think poor Charlie had a choice in the matter, one way or the other. In any case, I do know his application for a pension in 1927 was based on absolute need. The application records his and Margaret's combined yearly gross income as one hundred dollars and their two room box house, which was situtated on a half acre of land had an assessed value of two hundred dollars.

So, are there any other weekend genealogist out there? If so, how far back can you trace your ancestors? Have you collected any oral histories? If not, what are you waiting for? (smile)

A Cleveland Celebrity . . . In The House . . .

Judge Jean Murrell Capers

and Lori Johnson

from Lori's Picture

Lyndhurst, OH 2008

She was the first person I spied when I strolled over to the area in the bookstore where I would be signing and discussing my novel, After The Dance. She was a well-dressed, little old lady who'd taken a seat in the very last row and who from a distance put me in mind of the one and only Ms. Rosa Parks. The expression on her face was pleasant and inviting and as I approached her in order to say, "Hello," I immediately recognized that she was someone other than just a curious visitor or a weary senior citizen in need of a seat . . . she was most definitely somone of stature and importance.

I didn't reside in the Cleveland area long enough to learn all its history. I'd be hard-pressed to come up with more than a few names of the areas movers and shakers, African American or otherwise. But even I had heard of The Judge. While still residing in the Cleveland area, I'd following the news story about the senseless theft at her home and I'd shared her sadness and outrage.

So, as I was walking toward the dignified woman seated in the back, who'd from the looks of things, had arrived early for my event, my brain was working over-time trying to process what kept popping to the forefront of my mind--Hmm, she looks an awful lot like that judge I saw on TV years ago. Why on earth would a judge, who has to be well into her 90s be interested in attending my book signing?

Well, turns out it was indeed the retired Cleveland Municipal Court Judge, Jean Murrell Capers, who, by the way is a good-looking, sharp-minded 95 year old and who, believe it or not, had driven herself to my event (smile). To give you a bit of history--in 1949, Capers became the first African American councilwoman for Cleveland and from 1960 to 1964, she was an assistant Attorney General. In the late '70s she was appointed by the then Governor James A. Rhodes to an unexpired term as Cleveland Municipal Judge. Later, she won election to the post and went on to serve a full six-year term.

Anyway, The Judge had indeed come to see me--though I'm guessing my good friend and busybody (LOL) Dr. Sara Wilder must have personally invited her.

The Dear Judge waited until most of the other guest had left before approaching me, offering me her congrats and insisting we pose for a picture together. I volunteered to make it easier on her by coming out from behind the table, but she wouldn't hear of it. According to her, I was the celebrity that day (smile). Well, I don't know about all of that, but for a few minutes, I certainly felt a little larger than life knowing that I was in the company of such a dynamic and still quite spirited trailblazer.

Judge Jean Murrell Capers

and Lori Johnson

from Lori's Pic Collection

Lyndhurst, OH 2008

Thank you Judge Capers for being such a sweetheart, a woman of substance and a role model. I was truly touched and honored by your presence.

(In the coming days, look for me to share a few more of the pics from my Cleveland visit).

So What's In Heavy Rotation . . . On Your iPod / MP3 Player / Computer / CD Player?

One of the first things I did upon my return from the Cleveland area was go out and pick up Lalah Hathaway's lastest, Self-Portrait (2008). Making the purchase has been at the top of my "to do" list for the longest, especially after listening to Ms. Hathaway speak and sing live on some BETJ program, not too long ago. The only reason I hadn't picked it up before now is because I've just been too busy.

I've enjoyed Lalah's music since she first appeared on the scene. But I didn't become a real fan until one night in Cleveland, several years ago, while I was standing at the sink, washing dishes, listening to the radio and wishing I was elsewhere, when I heard this breath-taking cover of "Forever, For Always, For Love." While listening to the song, which in my book had long been a "Luther" song, I literally froze, cocked my head to the side and muttered, "Good Lord, who is that?!" before wiping my hands dry and rushing over to crank up the volume.

Before I left for my most recent trip the Cleveland area, I'd been jamming to The Song Lives On, a Joe Sample cd, featuring Lalah Hathaway and that came out in 1999. The cuts on The Song Lives On are nice enough, but trust and believe, the songs on Self-Portrait and Lalah's skillful handling of them are on the other side of FABULOUS.

Very seldom do I buy a cd (or album) and find myself reaching for the repeat button for more than two or three songs. But when it comes to Self-Portrait, it's been difficult to come up with a short list of favorites. No lie, there are 12 tracks on this cd and I've found a little something about everyone of them to love.

Of course, I can't get enough of the single that's been getting the most radio play, "Let Go," and the song which follows it, "Breathe" ain't half bad either. Lalah's voice on the 6th song on the cd, "Learning to Swim" is so perfect and pure, it's haunting. "Little Girl," the 8th song is touching, not only because it contains an excerpt from an interview with Donny Hathaway (Lalah's father, for the one or two of you who don't know), but also the following refrain: "just a little girl in a big world / hiding in the shadow of the light/ just a little girl in a big world/ listen to the voice of your divine." Everything time I hear that refrain, a voice inside of me shouts, "Have mercy girl, go 'head and preach then! (smile).

If we lived in another day and time (say like back in the '70s and early '80s) the 9th song, "What Goes Around," would be copping plenty of radio air time, if only because it's a "message" song that contains some hard-hitting universal truth. But the icing on the cake, as far as the song is concerned, is you can hear Lalah's daddy, Mr. Donny all up in this song. It's almost as if she's found a way to reach up into the heavens and musically channel him and his genius.

If you think I'm done, PLEASE (LOL). I'm just now getting to my favorite section of the cd, which at this point in time, are those last three songs, #10, 11 & 12. Song #10, "Naked Truth" is typically where I start the cd. I'm saying, this song, which is actually a duet of sorts with Rahsaan Patterson, has a real funky, juke-joint, slow-grind feel about it. Yup, something about it appeals to my nappy edges and deep southern delta roots. The song after it, #11, "Udo" is one of those jump in your car and ride songs. You ever looked over in the car next to you and seen a lone woman who has her window rolled up, but you can tell by the steady bob and sway of her head and shoulders, she's really into whatever she's listening to? Yeah, "Udo" is one of those songs (smile).

And #12, the last song, "Tragic Inevitability" is another one of those cuts owning that "haunting" quality about it. The song's mood reminds me of something from Terri Lyne Carrington's Real Life Story . . . Yeah, I know, most of y'all young'uns are saying WHO?! WHAT?! Anyway, Ms. Terri Lyne is a drummer and who, back in the day, was the house drummer for Arsenio Hall's show (remember him?). Not only can Carrington beat the hell out of some drums, her vocals aren't half bad either. If anyone knows where I can cop a cd version of Real Life Story to replace my worn-out cassette tape, let me know (smile).

Yes, the songs from Lalah Hathaway's Self-Portrait are what I'm jamming 24/7 at the moment. I'm impressed that she had a hand in penning just about all of the tunes in the compilation. Also, y'all know, the STAX connection is right down my alley (Memphis in Da House!) And sistergirl's voice, WOW, it's so smooth it reminds me of melted caramel . . . you know, creamy, bearing a hint of brown and owning a buttery sweetness that stays with you for a long time.

So . . . what's currently bumping through your musical rotation?

I'm Back . . . From Cleveland . . .

I'm still recuperating from the eight days I spent in Cleveland. Given that there was no snow on the ground nor a frigid chill in the air, I had a lovely time (smile). I reunited with a number of old friends, met some new ones and sold plenty of books. Next week, if all goes as planned, I'll share a few of the pictures from my various events.

I'd like to extend a special thanks to all of the folks who came out and supported my efforts as well all of the kind and generous people who hosted my events and assisted with publicity and promotion. The latter list includes the following individuals: Christina Dziak (PR & Events Coordinator, Joseph-Beth Booksellers, Legacy Village); Mary Oluonye & Waly Sene (owners of SeneAfrique Trading Company); Elayne Jackson (Public Services Assistant, Cuyahoga County Public Library); Emanuel Carpenter (writer, reviewer and all-around cool guy) and Rhonda Crowder (General Assignment Reporter, Call & Post).

All of my Cleveland events included a discussion segment and in the coming days, I hope to share some of the comments and insights I gained, not only about my novel (After The Dance), but reading, readers and African American Literature in general.

Emanuel Carpenter, who did an excellent job of giving voice to "Carl" at the public library event in Warrensville, posed a question that I don't think I answered properly during the discussion portion of my library event. His question was, "What do you miss the most about Cleveland?" In truth, I could write a book about what I don't miss about living in Cleveland (LOL) and I think I said as much, BUT there a number of things I do sincerely miss about the area. I'll share exactly what those things are in a future post. If anyone cares to guess, feel free to give it a shot. But I doubt if you'll succeed or even come close.

For those with an interest in knowing where I plan to turn up next, check out the sidebar on the right where you'll find a list of my upcoming events.