1) Okay, now what did you say your name was again?
2) Yeah, so after I'm finished with my probation . . .
3) Don't worry, the itching and burning doesn't last long . . .
4) Darn, I'm kind of low on cash. You think you could let me borrow (or loan me . . . or let me hold . . .)
5) No, seriously, the trailer . . . (or room in my parents' basement or the tricked-out mini-van, etc.) has a really nice hot tub . . .
6) My phone? Oh, that's just the wife calling to see where I am . . .
7) Oops, sorry, but I think it mighta broke . . .
8) You wanna come over? Mama and her dogs (or her cats or her ferrets or her goats or her ______ **you fill in the blank**) are generally fast asleep by now . . .
9) Funny, the woman I went out with last night said the exact same thing . . .
10) Soon as I get the flea (or the tick or the roach or the _____ ** fill in your vermin of choice **) infestation taken care of, I'll invite you over . . .
11) Did I ever tell you about the time I was on Jerry Springer? (or Maury Povich or Cops or Cheaters or _______ ** fill in your ignorant show of choice**)
12) Okay, I know it looks bad, but I'm really not all that contagious . . .
13) Holy crap! I think you mighta broke it . . .
Well, that's my list (smile). All comments and/or additions are welcome.
30 comments:
LOL....
I love the as soon as I'm off probation one.. LOL!
Bwahahahah, the date from hell. Bwahahahah. Very well done. Have a great TT. :)
Oh my gawd - TOO funny! Although I did hear a variation of #2 once when a date told me his curfew was at 11 p.m. and we both were over 40....
Smiles,
Holly
Funny stuff Lori! But don't most women want to date a man who has been on Jerry Springer?
The wonderfull world of dating!! You make it sound so fun, but not when it is happening to you!!
I've thankfully never had a date from hell. Happy TT. :)
Not sure which I liked the best :-)
Great TT
Ouch! Have you ever actually heard any of those?
http://agentlemansdomain.typepad.com/
Sad to think they've all been said more than once--or twice....
Thanks for the fun!
Eeew! That brings back memories!!
Happy TT!
Yeah, that would be a horrible thing to hear, all of them!
I'm so glad I don't have to hear any of those any more. I've actually heard three of those on one date (#2, #4 and #5).
Oh wow. Never really dated other than my husband so totally clueless on this one. :)
ROFLMAO...OMG, that is too funny. Yes, your absolutely right...I TOTALLY agree...lol. Happy TT.
Oh My Lol
LOL! That would be a disaster if ever any of it happens after a romantic date. :) Happy TT!
Very funny!! GREAT TT list:)
Incredible list. I love the Jerry Springer one!
The Pink Flamingo
http://thepinkflamingo.blogharbor.com/blog
Oh my thank god I have never had to hear any of those great list Happy TT-http://inraesworld.blogspot.com/
LOL! Great TT.
(PS: Your soon-to-be-released book sounds fabulous!)
LOL..I'm LOL'ing with that #4! :D great list here!
Mine is up here;
Thursday Thirteen
Happy TT!
Nice & funny list :)
Happy TT!
Mine's up here:
http://emmyrose1028.blogspot.com/2007/11/thursday-thirteen-18_08.html
Those are soo funny. I just had to forward this to my mom . I can hear her laughing 25 miles away.
ROFLMAO...That was hysterical!
Terrific Thursday Thirteen!
My TT is posted.
Have a wonderful day!
Happy TT'ing!
*^_^
(=':'=)
(")_ (")Š
Raggedy
Funny List
Omigosh, this was so hilarious! I cracked up.
Hop on over to mine if you'd like to get added to my TT blogroll (and you can check out my 13 immunity-boosters for the cold and flu season).
Maria
www.jubileeonearth.com
They don't care too much for ...HO HO HO either. Happy TT and Merry Christmas (((hugs))) Santa
I'm so glad I'm not in the dating scene LOL Hilarious!
Happy T13!
Great Thursday post! I love Thursdays! All my favorite shows, Earl, Greys anatomy, ER, that means no laundry after 7:30! Have a great TT. Hope to see you over at my blog!
DEB
Lori, have you ever thought of doing stand-up because you are FUNNY! Loved your list especially # 8, 10, and 12. Happy TT.
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